"Real opcodes" joke

AAC Alter All CommandsAAD Alter All DataAAO Add And OverflowAAR Alter At RandomAB Add BackwardsABC AlphaBetize CodeABR Add Beyond RangeACC Advance CPU ClockACDC Allow Controller to Delete ContentsACDP Allow Controller to Die PeacefullyACQT Advance Clock to Quitting TimeADB Another Dumb BugAEE Absolve Engineering ErrorsAFF Add Fudge FactorAFHB Align Fullword on Halfword BoundaryAFP Abnormalize Floating PointAFR Abort Funny RoutineAFVC Add Finagle's Variable ConstantAGB Add GarBageAGWA Add and Get Wrong AnswerAI Add ImproperAIB Attack Innocent BystanderAIB Attack Innocent BystandersAISG Access and Improve Student GradeAMM Add Mayo and MustardAMM Answer My MailAMS Add Memory to SystemANC ANnoy ConsultantAOI Annoy Operator ImmediateAR Advance RudelyAR Alter RealityARN Add and Reset to Non-zeroARN Add and Reset to NonzeroARZ Add and Reset to ZeroAS Add SidewaysASQGSA ASCII Stupid Question, Get a Stupid ANSIAT Accumulate TriviaAWP Argue With ProgrammerAWTT Assemble With Tinker ToysBA Branch AnywhereBAC Branch to Alpha CentauriBAD Branch And DieBAD Branch to Auto DestructBAF Blow All FusesBAH Branch And HangBALC Branch And Link CheeseburgerBAP Branch And PuntBAW Bells And WhistlesBB Branch on BugBBBB Byte Baudy Bit and BranchBBBF Branch on Bit Bucket FullBBD Branch on Bastille DayBBI Branch on Burned-out IndicatorBBIL Branch on Burned-out Indicator LightBBLB Branch on Blinking Light BulbBBT Branch on Binary TreeBBW Branch Both WaysBCB Burp and Clear BytesBCF Branch on Chip box FullBCIL Branch Creating Infinite LoopBCR Backspace Card ReaderBCS Branch and Crash SystemBCU Be Cruel and UnusualBD Backspace DiskBD Branch to DataBDC Break Down and CryBDI Branch to Data IndirectBDM Branch and Disconnect MemoryBDT Burn Data TreeBDU Branch on Dense UserBE Branch EverywhereBEW Branch Either WayBF Belch FireBF Blow FuseBF Branch ForeverBFD Branch on Full DiskBFF Branch and Form FeedBFM Be Fruitful and MultiplyBH Branch and HangBIR Branch Inside RanchBIRM Branch on Index Register MissingBLC Branch and Loop ContinuousBLI Branch and Loop InfiniteBLM Branch, Like, MaybeBLMWM Branch, Like, Maybe, Wow, ManBLP Boot from Line PrinterBLR Branch and Lose ReturnBLSH Buy Low, Sell HighBLT Break Little ThingBM Branch MaybeBMI Blow up Memory ImmediateBMI Branch on Missing IndexBMI Branch to Muncee ImmediateBMP Branch and Make PopcornBMR Branch Multiple RegistersBMUS Beam Me Up, ScottyBNA Branch to Nonexistant AddressBNCB Branch and Never Come BackBNL Become a Neo-LudditeBNR Branch for No ReasonBOB Branch On BugBOD Beat On DiskBOD Branch on Operator DesperateBOH Branch On HumidityBOH Branch on Operator HighBOHP Bribe Operator for Higher PriorityBOI Byte Operator ImmediatelyBOP Boot OPeratorBOT Branch On TreeBPB Branch on Program BugBPDI Be Polite, Don't InterruptBPIM Bury Programmer In ManualsBPL Branch PLeaseBPM Become a Psych MajorBPO Branch on Power OffBPO Branch on Power OnBPP Branch and Pull the PlugBR Byte and RunBRA Branch to Random AddressBRB BRanch on BeaverBRH BRanch and HangBRI BRanch IndefinitelyBRL BRanch and LeakBRO BRanch and OverheatBRO BRanch to OblivionBS Behave StrangelyBSC Branch on Second ComingBSC Burst Selector ChannelBSD BackSpace DiskBSI Back up Sewer ImmediateBSI Backup Sewer ImmediatelyBSM Branch and Scramble MemoryBSO Branch on Sleepy OperatorBSP BackSpace PunchBSR Branch and Stomp RegistersBSS Branch on SunSpotBSST BackSpace and Stretch TapeBTD Branch on Time of DayBTD Byte The DustBTI Blow Trumpet ImmediatelyBTJ Branch and Turn JapaneseBTO Branch To OblivionBTW Branch on Third WednesdayBU Branch UnexpectedlyBUTI Blow Up Terminal ImmediatelyBVS Branch and Veer SouthBW Branch on WhimBWC Branch When ConvenientBWF Busy, Wait ForeverBWOP BeWilder OPeratorBYDS Beware Your Dark SideBYTE BYte TEstCAC Calling All CarsCAC Cash And CarryCAF Convert ASCII to FarsiiCAI Corrupt Accounting InformationCAIL Crash After I LeaveCAR Cancel Accounts ReceivableCAT Confused And TiredCB Consult BozoCBA Compare and Branch AnywayCBBR Crash and Blow Boot Read-only memoryCBNC Close, But No CigarCBS Clobber BootStrapCC Call CalveryCC Compliment CoreCCB Chocolate Chip Byte-modeCCB Consult Crystal BallCCC Crash if Carry ClearCCCP Conditionally Corrupt Current ProcessCCD Choke Cough and DieCCD Clear Core and DumpCCR Change Channels at RandomCCS Chinese Character SetCCWR Change Color of Write RingCD Complement DiskCDC Clear Disk and CrashCDC Close Disk CoverCDIOOAZ Calm Down, It's Only Ones And ZeroesCDS Change Disk SpeedCEMU Close Eyes and Monkey with User spaceCEX Call EXterminatorCF Come From [replaces goto]CFE Call Field EngineerCFP Change and Forget PasswordCFS Corrupt File StructureCG Convert to GarbageCH Create HavocCHCJ Compare Haig to Christine JorgensenCHPAMR CHase Pointers Around Machine RoomCHSE Compare Half-words and Swap if EqualCIB Change Important ByteCIC Cash In ChipsCID Compare and Ignore DataCIMM Create Imaginary Memory MapCIZ Clear If ZeroCLBR CLoBber RegisterCLBRI CLoBber Register ImmediateCM Circulate MemoryCMD CPU Melt DownCMD Compare Meaningless DataCMI Clobber Monitor ImmediateCML Compute Meaning of LifeCMP Create Memory ProsthesisCMS Click MicroSwitchCN Compare NonsensicallyCNB Cause Nervous BreakdownCNS Call Nonexistent SubroutineCOCS Copy Object Code to SourceCOD Crash On DemandCOLB Crash for Operator's Lunch BreakCOM Clear Operator's MindCOMF COMe FromCON Call Operator NowCOS Copy Object code to Source fileCOWYHU Come Out With Your Hands UpCP Compliment ProgrammerCP%FKM CPU (em FlaKeout ModeCP%WM CPU (em Weird ModeCPB Create Program BugCPN Call Programmer NamesCPPR Crumple Printer Paper and RipCRASH Continue Running After Stop or HaltCRB CRash and BurnCRD Confirm Rumor by DenialCRM CReate MemoryCRM Clear Random MemoryCRN Compare with Random NumberCRN Convert to Roman NumeralsCRYPT reCuRsive encrYPt TapeCS Crash SystemCSL Curse and Swear LoudlyCSN Call Supervisor NamesCSNIO Crash System on Next I/OCSS Crash Subsidiary SystemsCSU Call Self UnconditionalCTDMR Change Tape Density, Mid RecordCTT Call Time and TemperatureCU Convert to UnaryCUC Cheat Until CaughtCVFL ConVert Floating to LogicalCVFP ConVert Fortran to PascalCVG ConVert to GarbageCVU ConVert to UnaryCWAH Create Woman And HoldCWB Carry With BorrowCWDC Cut Wires and Drop CoreCWG Chase Wild GooseCWGK Compare Watt to Genghis KhanCWIT Compare Watt to Ivan the TerribleCWM Compare Watt to MussoliniCWOM Complement Write-Only MemoryCZZC Convert Zone to Zip CodeDA Develop AmnesiaDAB Delete All BugsDAC Divide And ConquerDAD Destroy A-DiskDAO Divide And OverflowDAP De-select Active PeripheralDAUF Delete All Useless FilesDB Drop BitsDBL Desegregate Bus LinesDBR DeBase RegisterDBTP Drop Back Ten and PuntDBZ Divide By ZeroDC Degauss CoreDC Divide and ConquerDCAD Dump Core And DieDCD Drop Cards DoubleDCGC Dump Confusing Garbage to ConsoleDCI Disk Crash ImmediateDCON Disable CONsleDCR Double-precision CRashDCT Drop Cards TripleDD Destroy DiskDD Drop DiskDDC Dally During CalculationsDDOA Drop Dead On AnswerDDS Delaminate Disk SurfaceDDT Debug ProgramDDWB Deposit Directly in Waste BasketDEB Disk Eject BothDEC Decompile Executable CodeDEI Disk Eject ImmediateDEM Disk Eject MemoryDFA Disable FAnsDGO Decrement the Grades of OthersDGT Dispense Gin and TonicDHTPL Disk Head Three Point LandingDIA Develop Ineffective AddressDICE Delete Invalid Customer EngineerDIE DIsable EverythingDIF DIsable FusesDIG DIsable GravityDIH Disable Interrupts and HangDIRFO Do It Right For OnceDISC DISmount CPUDK Destroy KlingonsDKP Disavow Knowledge of ProgrammerDLN Don't Look NowDLP Drain Literal PoolDMAG Do MAGicDMNS Do what i Mean, Not what i SayDMP Destroy Memory Protect keyDMPE Decide to Major in Phys. Ed. DMPK Destroy Memory Protect KeyDMZ Divide Memory by ZeroDND Destroy Neighbor's DataDNPG Do Not Pass GoDO Divide and OverflowDO Divide and Overflow [IBM PC]DOC Drive Operator CrazyDOV Divide and OVerflowDP Destroy PeripheralsDPC Decrement Program CounterDPCS Decrement Program Counter SecretlyDPK Destroy storage Protect KeyDPMI Declare Programmer Mentally IncompetentDPN Double Precision No-opDPR Destroy PRogramDPS Disable Power SupplyDR Detach RootDRAF DRAw FlowchartDRAM Decrement RAMDRBA Deposit Round-off in my Bank AccountDRD DRop DeadDRI Disable Random InterruptDROM Destroy ROMDRT Disconnect Random TerminalDS Deadlock SystemDSD Dismount System DiskDSI Do Something InterestingDSO Disable System OperatorDSP Degrade System PerformanceDSR Detonate Status RegisterDSTD Do Something Totally DifferentDSUIT Do Something Utterly, Indescribably TerribleDT%FFP DecTape (em unload and Flappa FlaPDT%SHO DecTape (em Spin Hubs OppositeDTB Destructively Test BitDTC Destroy This CommandDTE Decrement Telephone ExtensionDTI Do The ImpossibleDTRT Do The Right ThingDTVFL Destroy Third Variable From LeftDU Dump UserDUD Do Until DeadDW Destroy WorldDWIM Do What I MeanDWIT Do What I'm ThinkingDWIW Do What I WantEA Enable AnythingEAC Emulate Acoustic CouplerEAL Enable AC to Logic rackEAO Enable AC to OperatorEBB Edit and Blank BufferEBB Empty Bit BucketEBR Erase Before ReadingEBRS Emit Burnt Resistor SmellEC Eat CardECF Explode and Catch FireECL Early Care LaceECO Electrocute Computer OperatorECP Erase Card PunchED Eject DiskED Execute DataEDD Eat Disk and DieEDIT Erase Data and Increment TimeEDP Emulate Debugged ProgramEDR Emit Deadly RadiationEDR Execute Destructive ReadEDS Execute Data SegmentEEOIFNO Execute Every Other Instruction From Now OnEEP Erase Entire ProgramEFB Emulate Five-volt BatteryEFD Eject Floppy DiskEFD Emulate Frisbee using Disk packEFE Emulate Fatal ErrorEHC Emulate Headless ChickenEIA Elvis Is AliveEIAO Execute In Any OrderEIO Erase I/O pageEIO Execute Invalid Op-codeEIO Execute Invalid OpcodeEIOC Execute Invalid Op-CodeEJD EJect DiskEJD%V EJect Disk (em with initial velocity VELP Enter Loop PermenantlyEM EMulate 407EM Evacuate MemoryEMIF Erase Most Important FileEMM Emulate More MemoryEMPC EMulate Pocket CalculatorEMSE Edit and Mark Something ElseEMSL Entire Memory Shift LeftEMT Electrocute Maintenance TechnicianEMW Emulate Maytag WasherENA ENable AnythingENE ENable EverythingEND Erase Neighbor's DataENF Emit Noxious FumesENG ENable GravityENO Emulate No-OpEO Electrocute OperatorEOB Execute Operator and BranchEOI Explode On InterruptEOS Erase Operating SystemEP Execute ProgrammerEPD Explode Peripheral DeviceEPI Execute Programmer ImmediateEPITS Execute Previous Instruction Then SkipEPL Emulate Phone LineEPP Eject Printer PaperEPS Electrostatic Print and SmearEPS Execute Program SidewaysEPSW Execute Program Status WordEPT Erase Process TableEPT Erase Punched TapeERIC Eject Random Integrated CircuitERM Erase Reserved MemoryEROM Erase Read-Only MemoryEROS Erase Read-Only StorageEROS Erase Read-Only Storage [Everex int]ERS Erase Read-only StorageESB Eject Selectric BallESC Emulate System CrashESD Eject Spinning DishESL Exceed Speed of LightESP Enable SPrinkler systemETI Execute This InstructionETM Emulate Trinary MachineETPH E. T. Phone HomeEVC Execute Verbal CommandsEWD Enter Warp DriveEWM Enter Whimsy ModeEXB EXcrement and BranchEXE EXecute EngineerEXI EXecute Invalid operationEXO EXecute OperatorEXOP EXecute OPeratorEXP EXecute ProgrammerEXPP EXecute Political PrisonerFAY Fetch Amulet of YendorFB Find BugsFC Fry ConsoleFCJ Feed Card and JamFCJ Feed Cards and JamFD Forget DataFDR Feed Disk RandomlyFERA Forms Eject and Run AwayFFF Form Feed ForeverFLD FLing DiskFLI Flash Lights ImpressivelyFM Forget MemoryFMP Finish My ProgramFOPC False Out-of-Paper ConditionFPC Feed Paper ContinuouslyFPT Fire Photon TorpedoesFRG Fill with Random GarbageFRS Fetch Ring of SauronFS Feign SleepFSM Fold, Spindle, and MutilateFSR Form Skip and RunawayFSRA Forms Skip and Run AwayFYBR Follow Yellow Brick RoadGAP Grade All ProjectsGBB Go to Back of BusGCAR Get Correct Answer RegardlessGCR Generate Confusing ResultsGDP Grin Defiantly at ProgrammerGDR Grab Degree and RunGENT GENerate ThesisGEW{JO} Go to the End of the World {Jump Off}GFD Go Forth and DivideGFM Go Forth and MultiplyGIE Generate Irreversible ErrorGL Get LostGLC Generate Lewd CommentGMC Generate Machine CheckGMCC Generate Machine Check and CashGND Guess at Next DigitGORS GO Real SlowGPCR Generate Petty Cache RequestGR Get RealGREM Generate Random Error MessageGREP Global Ruin, Expiration, and PurgationGRMC Generate Rubber Machine CheckGS Get StrangeGSB Gulp and Store BytesGSI Generate Spurious InterruptsGSU Geometric Shift UpGTJ Go To JailHAC Hold All CallsHACF Halt And Catch FireHAH Halt And HangHBW Hang Bus and WaitHCF Halt and Catch FireHCP Hide Central ProcessorHCRS Hang in CRitical SectionHDH Hi Dee HoHDO Halt and Disable OperatorHDRW Halt and Display Random WordHELP Hinder Everyone with Little ProductivityHELP Type' No Help Available'HEO Halt and Execute OperatorHF Hide FileHGD Halt, Get DrunkHHB Halt and Hang BusHIS Halt in Imposible StateHOO Hide Operator's OutputHRPR Hang up and Ruin Printer RibbonHSC Halt on System CrashHSJ Halt, Skip and JumpHTC Halt and Toss CookiesHTS Halt and Throw SparksHUAL Halt Until After LunchHUP Hang Up PhoneHWP Halt Without ProvocationIA Illocical AndIAE Ignore All ExceptionsIAI Inquire And IgnoreIAND Illogical ANDIAR Ignore All RequestsIB Insert BugIBM Increment and Branch to MunceeIBP Insert Bug and ProceedIBR Insert Bugs at RandomICB Interrupt, Crash and BurnICM Immerse Central MemoryICMD Initiate Core Melt DownICR Incur Costly Repair [Sun Tempest]ICSP Invert Crt Screen PictureIDC Initiate Destruct CommandIDI Invoke Divine InterventionIDNOP InDirect No-OPIDPS Ignore Disk Protect SwitchIEOF Ignore End Of FileIF Invoke ForceIGI Increment Grade ImmediateIGIT Increment Grade Immediate TwiceIGO Increment Grade OvernightIHC Initiate Head CrashIHTFP Increment Hormones, Test For PubertyII Inquire and IgnoreIIB Ignore Inquiry and BranchIIC Insert Invisible CharactersIIL Irreversable Infinite LoopIM Imagine MemoryIMBP Insert Mistake and Blame ProgrammerIMP Imitate Monty PythonIMPG IMPress GirlfriendIMV IMpress VisitorsINCAM INCrement Arbitrary MemoryING INquire and iGnoreINI Ignore Next InstructionINOP Indirect No-OPINR INstigate RumorINW INvalidate WarrantyIOI Ignore Operator's InstructionIOR Illogical ORIOS Ignore Operating SystemIP Increment and PrayIPI Ignore Previous InstructionIPM Ignore Programmer's MistakesIPOP Interrupt Processor, Order PizzaIPS Incinerate Power SupplyIPS Increment Power SupplyIPT Ignite Paper TapeIRB Invert Record and BranchIRBI Insert Random Bits IndexedIRC Insert Random CommandsIRE Insert Random ErrorsIRI Ignore Rude InterruptsIRPF Infinite Recursive Page FaultISC Ignore Supervisor CallsISC Ignore System CrashISC Insert Sarcastic CommentsISI Increment and Skip on InifinityISP Increment and Skip on PiISTK Invert STacKITML Initiate Termites into Macro LibraryIU Ignore User[s]IXOR Illogical eXclusive ORIZ Ignore ZeroesJAA Jump Almost AlwaysJBS Jump and Blow StackJCI Jump to Current InstructionJFM Jump on Full MoonJHRB Jump to H&R BlockJLP Jump and Lose PointerJLR Jump and Lose ReturnJMAT JuMp on Alternate ThursdaysJN Jump to NowhereJNL Jump when programmer is Not LookingJOB Jump On BeaverJOM Jump Out of MemoryJOM Jump Over MoonJOP Jump OPeratorJPA Jump when Pizza ArrivesJRAN Jump RANdomJRCF Jump Relative and Catch FireJRGA Jump Relative and Get ArrestedJRL Jump to Random LocationJRSR Jump to Random SubRoutineJSC Jump on System CrashJSOR Jump Somewhere Over RainbowJSU Jump Self UnconditionalJT Jump if TuesdayJTT Jump and Tangle TapeJTZ Jump to Twilight ZoneJWN Jump When NecessaryKCE Kill Consultant on ErrorKCE Kill repairman [CE]KDO Knock Disk OverKEPITU Kill Every Process In The UniverseKOP Kill OPeratorKP Krunch PaperKPR Kill PRogrammerKSR Keyboard Shift RightKUD Kill User's DataKWWE Kill Wicked Witch of EastKWWW Kill Wicked Witch of WestLAC Lose All CommunicationLAGW Load And Go WrongLAP Laugh At ProgramLAP Laugh At ProgrammerLCC Load and Clear CoreLCD Launch Cartridge DiskLCK Lock Console KeyswitchLEB Link Edit BackwardsLIA Load Ineffective AddressLMB Lose Message and BranchLMO Load and Mug OperatorLMYB Logical MaYBeLN Lose inode NumberLNP Load N digits of PiLOSM Log Off System ManagerLP%PAS Line Printer (em Print And SmearLP%RDD Line Printer (em Reverse Drum DirectionLP%TCR Line Printer (em Tangle and Chew RibbonLPA Lead Programmer AstrayLPRTC Load Program counter from Real Time ClockLR Load RevolverLRA Load RetroActivelyLRB Lose Record and BranchLRD Load Random DataLSPSW Load and Scramble PSWLTS Link To SputnikLTS Loop Till SmokesLUM LUbricate MemoryLWE Load WhatEverLWM Load Write-only MemoryMAB Melt Address BusMAN Make Animal NoisesMAZ Multiply Answer by ZeroMBC Make Batch ConfettiMBF Multiply and Be FruitfulMBH Memory Bank Hold-upMBTD Mount Beatles on Tape DriveMBTOL Move Bug To Operator's LunchMC Move ContinuousMD Move DeviousMDB Move and Drop BitsMDC Make Disk CrashMDDHAF Make Disk Drive Hop Across FloorMFO Mount Female OperatorMILI Move It or Lose ItMLB Memory Left shift and BranchMLP Make Lousy ProgramMLP Multiply and Lose PrecisionMLR Move and Lose RecordMMF Melt Main FrameMMLG Make Me Look GoodMNI Misread Next InstructionMOG Make Operator GrowlMOP Modify Operator's PersonalityMPLP Make Pretty Light PatternMRZ Make Random ZapMSGD Make Screen Go DimMSP Mistake Sign for ParityMSPI Make Sure Plugged InMSR Melt Special RegisterMST Mount Scotch TapeMTE Mangle Tape on ExitMTI Make Tape InvalidMUG Make Ugly GraphicsMUM Multi-Use MnemonicsMW Malfunction WheneverMW Multiply WorkMWC Move and Wrap CoreMWT Malfunction Without TellingNBC Negate By ClearingNCW Notch Carriage and WayNMI Negate Most IntegersNOP Needlessly Omit PointerNPC Normalize Program CounterNPN No Program Necessary [VAX]NTGH Not Tonight, i've Got a HeadacheOBB Overflow Bit BucketOCF Open Circular FileOMC Obscene Message to ConsoleOMC Overheat Memory ChipOML Obey Murphy's LawsOPI Order Pizza ImmediatelyOPP Order Pizza for ProgrammerOSI Overflow Stack ImmediateOSI Overflow Stack IndefiniteOSP Open Six-PackOTL Out To LunchOU Offend UserP$*! Punch ObscenityPA Punch in ASCIIPAL Pack And LeavePAS Print And SmearPAUD PAUse DramaticallyPAZ Pack Alpha ZonePAZ Pack Alpha and drop ZonesPBC Print and Break ChainPBD Print and Break DrumPBL Pack Bags and LeavePBM Pop Bubble MemoryPBPBPBP Place Backup in Plain Brown Paper Bag PleasePBST Play Batch mode Star TrekPCB Pause for Coffee BreakPCD PunCh DiskPCI Pleat Cards ImmediatePCR Print and Cut RibbonPCS Push to Centre of StackPD Play DeadPD Punch DiskPDLD Power Down and Lock Door [to computer room]PDSK Punch DiSKPEHC Punch Extra Holes in CardsPEP Print on Edge of PaperPFD Punt on Fourth DownPFE Print Floating EyePFML Print Four Million LinesPG Print GarbagePHO Pull Hair OutPI Punch InvalidPIBM Pretend to be an IBMPIC Print Illegible CharactersPIC Print Invalid CharacterPIC Punch Invalid CharacterPLSC Perform Light Show on ConsolePNIH Place Needle In HaystackPNRP Print Nasty Replies to ProgrammerPO Punch OperatorPOCL Punch Out Console LightsPOG Print Only GreekPOP Pop Or PushPOPI Punch OPerator ImmediatePOPN Punch OPerator's NosePPA Print Paper AirplanesPPC Purge Pascal Compiler [HP 3000]PPL Perform Perpetual LoopPPP Print Programmer's PicturePPR Play Punk RockPPSW Pack Program Status WordPPSW Pack Progran Status WordPRS PRint and SmearPSP Print and Shred PaperPSR Print and Shred RibbonPTP Produce Toilet PaperPUO Perform Unknown OperationPVLC Punch Variable Length CardPWP Print Without PaperPWS create PoWer SurgePYS Program YourSelfQBDH Quit and Become a DeadHeadQWYA Quit While Your AheadRA Randomize AnswerRAM Randomly Access MemoryRAM Read Ambiguous MemoryRAN RANdom opcode [similar to 16-bit what gate]RASC Read And Shred CardRAST Read And Shred TapeRAU Ridicule All UsersRBAO Ring Bell and Annoy OperatorRBLY Restore Back-up from Last YearRBT Read Blank TapeRBT Rewind and Break TapeRC Rewind CoreRCAJ Read Card And JamRCB Read Command BackwardsRCB Run Clock BackwardsRCC Read Card and ChewRCCP Randomly Corrupt Current ProcessRCF Rewind Cabinet FansRCKG Read Count Key and GarbageRCL Rotate Carry LeftRCP Reschedule Car PaymentsRCR Rewind Card ReaderRCRV Randomly Convert to Reverse VideoRCS Read Card and Scramble dataRCSD Read Card and Scramble DataRD Randomize DataRD Reverse DirectionsRDA Refuse to Disclose AnswerRDB Replace Database with BlanksRDB Run Disk BackwardsRDD Reverse Disk DriveRDDBF Rock Disk Drive Back and ForthRDEB Read and Drop Even number of BitsRDF Randomize Directory FilenamesRDI Reverse Drum ImmediateRDI Reverse Drun ImmediateRDI Rewind Disk ImmediateRDR Reverse Disk RotationRDS ReaD SidewaysRENVR REName Variables RandomlyRET Read and Erase TapeRF Read FingerprintsRG Record GarbageRHNEZ Randomize and Halt if Not Equal to ZeroRHO Randomize and Hold all OutputRIC Rotate Illogical thru CarryRID Read Invalid DataRIG Read Inter-record GapRIOP Rotate I/O PortsRIR Read Invalid RecordRIRG Read Inter-Record GapRJE Return Jump and ExplodeRLC Relocate and Lose CoreRLC Reread Last CardRLC Rotate Left with CarolynRLI Rotate Left IndefinitelyRLP Refill Light PenRLP Rewind Line PrinterRM Ruin My filesRMI Randomize Memory ImmediateRMM Read Manager's MindRMT ReMove TrapRMV Remove Memory VirtuesRN Read NoiseRNBS Reflect Next Bus SignalRNR Read Noise RecordROC Randomize Op CodesROC Rotate Outward from CenterROD ROtate DiagonallyROM Read Operator's MindROO Rub Out OperatorROOP Run Out Of PaperROPF Read Other People's FilesROS Reject Operating SystemROS Return On ShieldRP Read PrinterRPB Raise Parity BitsRPB Read Print and BlushRPB Reverse Parity and BranchRPBR Reverse Parity and BRanchRPC Rotate Program CounterRPM Read Programmer's MindRPU Read character and Print UpsidedownRRC Rotate Random thru CarryRRR Randomly Rotate RegisterRRR Read Record and Run awayRRR Read Record and Run-awayRRRL Random Rotate Register LeftRRRR Random Rotate Register RightRRSTC Return on Ruby Slippers Triple-ClickRRT Record and Rip TapeRS Random SlewRSD on Read error Self-DestructRST Rewind and Stretch TapeRSTOM Read from STore-Only MemoryRT Reduce ThroughputRTP Reduce ThroughPutRTS Return To SenderRVAC Return from VACationRWC ReWind and Crash headsRWCR ReWind Card ReaderRWD ReWind DiskRWE Run Without ErrorRWF Read Wrong FileRWT Read/Write while stretching TapeSA Store AnywhereSAD Search And DestroySAI Skip All InstructionsSAK Snooze At KeyboardSAS Show Appendix ScarSAS Sit And SpinSBE Swap Bits ErraticallySBF Skip on Bitbucket FullSC Scramble ChannelsSC Shred CardsSCB Spindle Card and BelchSCCA Short Circuit on Correct AnswerSCD Shuffle and Cut DecSCH Slit Cards HorizontalSCI Shred Cards ImmediateSCM Set for Crash ModeSCOM Set Cobol-Only ModeSCP SCatter PrinterSCRRC SCRamble Register ContentsSCST Switch Channel to Star TrekSCTR Stick Card To ReaderSD Scramble DirectorySD Slip DiskSDC Spool Disk to ConsoleSDD Seek and Destroy DataSDD Spin Disk DrySDDB Snap Disk Drive BeltSDE Solve Differential EquationsSDI Self Destruct ImmediateSDM Search and Destroy MemorySDR Slam Down Rondo [worst soda ever made]SEB Stop Eating and BurpSEOB Set Every Other BitSESUR Sing Elvis Songs Until he ReturnsSEX Set EXecution registerSEX Sign EXtendSFH Set Flags to Half-mastSFP Send For PizzaSFR Send For ReinforcementsSFT Stall For TimeSFTT Strip Form Tractor TeethSHAB SHift A BitSHABM SHift A Bit MoreSHB Stop and Hang BusSHCD SHuffle Card DeckSHON Simulate HONeywell CPU [permanent no-op]SHR SHift RandomSHRC SHRed CardSHRT SHRed TapeSID Switch to Infinite DensitySIP Store Indefinite PrecisionSJV Scramble Jump VectorsSLP Sharpen Light PenSMC Scramble Memory ContentsSMD Spontaneous Memory DumpSMR Skip on Meaningless ResultSMS Shred Mylar SurfaceSNARF System Normalize And Reset FlagsSNM Show No MercySNO Send Nukes on OverflowSOAWP SOlve All the World'd ProblemsSOB Stew On BrewSOD Surrender Or DieSOL Shift On LowSOP Stop and Order PizzaSOS Sign Off, StupidSOT Sit On a TackSP Scatter PrintSPA Sliding Point ArithmeticSPB Simulate Peanut ButterSPD SPin DiskSPS Set Panel SwitchesSPSW Scramble Program Status WordSQPWYC Sit Quietly and Play With Your CrayonsSRBO Set Random Bits to OnesSRBZ Set Random Bits to ZeroesSRC Select Random ChannelSRC Select Reader and Chew cardsSRCC Select Reader and Chew CardsSRD Switch to Random DensitySRDR Shift Right Double RidiculousSRO Sort with Random OrderingSROS Store in Read-Only StorageSRR Shift Registers RandomSRSD Seek Record and Scar DiskSRSD Seek Record and Scratch DiskSRTC Stop Real-Time ClockSRU Signoff Random UserSRZ Subtract and Reset to ZeroSSB Scramble Status ByteSSD Scratch System DiskSSD Stacker Select DiskSSD Stop and Scratch Disk [3815]SSJ Select Stacker and JamSSJP Select Stacker and JumPSSM Solve by Supernatural MeansSSM Stacker Select MemorySSP Seek SPindleSSP Smoke and SParkSST Seek and Stretch TapeSSW Scramble Status WordST Set and TestSTA STore AnywhereSTC Slow To a CrawlSTD Stop, Take DrugsSTM STretch MagtapeSTM Skip on Third MondaySTO Strangle Tape OperatorSTPR SToP RainSTRIKE STRIKE for more pay, better hours, etc. STROM STore in Read-Only MemorySTTHB Set Terminal to Three Hundred BaudSUIQ Subtract User's IQSUME SUprise MESUP Shred User PrintoutSUP Solve Unsolvable ProblemSUS Stop Until SpringSUS Subtract Until SenselessSWAT SWAp TerminalsSWN SWap NibblesSWOS Store in Write-Only StorageSWS Sort to Wrong SlotsSWT Select Wrong TerminalSWU Select Wrong UnitSWZN Skip Whether Zero or NotSZD Switch to Zero DensityTAH Take A HikeTAI Trap Absurd InputsTARC Take Arithmetic Review CourseTBFTG Two Burgers and Fries To GoTC Transmit ColorsTDB Transfer and Drop BitsTDRB Test and Destroy Random BitsTDS Trash Data SegmentTET Triple Execution Time [SUN]TLNF Teach me a Lesson i'll Never ForgetTLO Turn indicator Lights OffTLW Transfer and Lose WayTN Take a NapTOAC Turn Off Air ConditionerTOG Take Out GarbageTOG Time Out, GraduateTOH Take Operator HostageTOO Turn On/off OperatorTOP Trap OPeratorTOS Trash Operating SystemTOW Take Over WorldTPD Terminal Printer DestructTPD Total Program DiagnosticTPD Triple Pack DecimalTPDH Tell Programmer to Do it HimselfTPF Turn Power oFfTPN Turn Power oNTPO Turn Power OffTPR Tear PapeRTR Turn into RubbishTRA Te Rdls Arvs [type ridiculous abbreviations]TRD TRansfer and Drop bitTSH Trap Secretary and HaltTSM Trap Secretary and MountTST Trash System TracksTT%CN TeleType (em Clunk NoiseTT%EKB TeleType (em Electrify KeyBoardTTA Try, Try AgainTTIHLIC Try To Imagine How Little I CareTTITT Turn 2400 foot Tape Into Two 1200 foot TapesTTL Tap Trunk LineTTL Time To LogoffTYF Trust Your FeelingsUA Unload AccumulatorUAI Use Alternate Instruction setUAPA(AM) Use All Power Available (And More)UCB Uncouple CPU and BranchUCIP Update Card In PlaceUCK Unlock Console KeyswitchUCLB Uncouple Comm Lines and BranchUCM Uncouple CoMm lines and branchUCPUB Uncouple CPUs and BranchUDR Update and Delete RecordUER Update and Erase RecordUFO Unidentified Flag OperationULDA UnLoaD AccumulatorUMR Unlock Machine RoomUNPD UNPlug and DumpUOP Useless OPerationUP Understand Program[mer]UPA Use all Power AvailableUPC Understand Program[mer]'s CommentsUPI Undo Previous InstructionURB Update, Resume and BranchUTF Unwind Tape onto FloorUTF Use The ForceUUBR Use Undefined Base RegisterVAX Violate All eXecutionsVFE Violate Field EngineerVFO Violate Female OperatorVMA Violate Maintenance AgreementVNO Violate Noise OrdinanceVPA Vanishing Point ArithmeticVVM Vaporize Virtual MemoryWAD Walk Away in DisgustWAT WAste TimeWBB Write to the Bit BucketWBT Water Binary TreeWC Waste CoreWCR Write to Card ReaderWDR Warp disk DRiveWED Write and Erase DataWEMG Write Eighteen Minute GapWF Wait ForeverWGPB Write Garbage in Process-control BlockWHFO Wait until Hell Freezes OverWHP Wave Hands over ProgramWI Why ImmediateWI Write IllegiblyWID Write Invalid DataWMC Write Millions of CommentsWNAM We Need A MiracleWNHR Write New Hit RecordWNR Write Noise RecordWP Write PoopWPET Write Past End of TapeWPM Write Programmer's MindWSE Write Stack EverywhereWSWW Work in Strange and Wondrous WaysWUPO Wad Up Printer OutputWWLR Write Wrong Length RecordWWR Write Wrong RecordXXIO eXecute Invalid OpcodeXXKF eXecute Kermit the FrogXXM eXclusive MaybeXXMB eXclusive MayBeXXOH eXecute no-Op and HangXXOR eXecute OpeRatorXXOS eXchange Operator's SexXXPR eXecute PRogrammerXXPSW eXecute Program Status WordXXSP eXecute Systems ProgrammerXXVF eXchange Virtue for FunYAB Yet Another BugYASE Yet Another Stupid ErrorZAP Zero and Add PackedZAR Zero Any RegisterZD Zap DirectoryZEOW Zero Every Other WordZPI ZaP Immediate

1
2
 Time, All, Back, Three, Two, Never, Take, Little, Call, Right, Look, Over, Last, Head, Other, Next, Light, Computing, Something, Phone, Change, Stupid, Left, World, Store, Another, Play, Sign, Stop, Open, Answer, Wrong, Place, Use, Hands, Drive, Read, Real, Line, Machine, Turn, Show, Female, Wait, Bank, Paper, Send, Eat, Third, Test, Order, Kill, System, Full, Try, Write, Understand, Jump, Message, Bus, End, Hold, Neighbor, Field, Card, Pull, Foot, Run, Move, Important, Clock, Screen, Catch, Program, Power, Become, Point, Ring, Secretary, Lose, Close, Witch, Bit, Forget, Form, Memory, Data, Return, Cut, Disk, Blow, Star, Cards, Correct, Break, Drop, Cash, Pack, Enter, Pizza, Double, Laugh, Tape, Operator, Set, Programmer, Crash, Sit, Hang, Grade, Lights, Noise, User, Available, Attack, Object, Supervisor, Carry, Feed, Hide, Operating, Garbage, Allow, Quit, Record, Process, Mistake, Switch, Sort, Create, Insert, Load, Clear, Copy, Imagine, Trap, Add, Access, Chip, Scratch, Lock, Trash, Branch, Dump, Waste, Shift, Exchange, Blank, Search, Elvis, Previous, Forth, Printer, Delete, Terminal, Current, Floating, Invalid, Print, Bug, Zero, Register, Pop, Mount, Random, Deposit, Perform, Length, Solve, Maintenance, Boot, Punch, Ignore, Chew, Reverse, Useless, Infinite, Melt, Ruin, Destroy, Seek, Stack, Central, Skip, Drum, Byte, Status, Exclusive, Spin, Fetch, Sewer, Annoy, Instruction, Stretch, Generate, Protect, Alter, Self, Innocent, Transfer, Reader, Develop, Controller, Multiply, Triple, Thru, Compare, Core, Reduce, Console, Alpha, Explode, Confusing, Link, Overflow, Bits, Swap, Backup, Relative, Select, Reset, Warp, Advance, Compliment, Divide, Cpu, Eject, Update, Immediate, Wicked, Convert, Invoke, Loop, Subtract, Initiate, Interrupt, Enable, Meaningless, Rotate, Execute, Malfunction, Binary, Corrupt, Watt, Batch, Consult, Alternate, Variable, Simulate, Unlock, Halt, Disable, Emit, Stacker, Burned-out, Electrocute, Erase, Ascii, Rewind, Parity, Disconnect, Backspace, Randomly, Edit, Shred, Ineffective, Spindle, Inquire, Illogical, Invert, Destruct, Tangle, Negate, Normalize, Scramble, Randomize, Read-only, Datard, Clobber, Complement, Immediaterdi, Write-only, Diskssd, Decrement, Teletype, Dectape, Uncouple, Emulate, Mer, Increment, Violate

Not enough votes...

Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 3 vote(s). 33% are positive. 0 comment(s).