Current Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Physics Puzzle...

    Hot 1 year ago

    Physics Puzzle... Nice one - try to crack it. ....
    Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers. One day a beautiful young girl, of around 18 years, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus.
    Unfortunately the beautiful young girl came under the bus and died on the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court.
    The judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment. He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room. The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him. But to everyone's amazement, he survived.
    The judge decided to set him free, and the conductor returned to his profession. After a few months, this time, a good looking middle aged woman tried to board the bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately, this time more...

    ASTROLOGY: tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth. Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy, and what you watch on TV. Well, the Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by your job title, people will have you all figured out...MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing, which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.SALES: Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without a degree," you are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with "customers" so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek admiration for your golf game throughout your life.TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal more...

    JehovaScript

    Hot 3 years ago

    The next generation embeddable scripting language for the web!
    JehovaScript (JS) is a powerful language with many advantages over
    current scripting systems. Its features include active alerts, a
    miracle system and error-collection. Rather than being defined as
    DOM-compliant, object-oriented or nth-generation, JS is
    Buzzword-Compliant, so your place at the forefront of technology is
    guaranteed regardless of trend-changes in the world of computing.
    Main features
    Miracles
    Each run of a JS program is entitled to three miracles. This allows
    you to deal gracefully with unexpected problems: you can create the
    needed RAM if memory allocation fails, or temporarily change the
    user's browser if the current browser does not support a certain
    feature of the language.
    Polymorphic constants
    Rather than create specialized logic for different situations, you can
    change the interpreters beliefs about constants. For example, the more...

    Radio Shack Q&A

    Hot 6 years ago

    Do these guys at Radio Shack ever get on your nerves, asking you
    for a bunch of personal data when you're just there to buy something as
    simple as a couple AA batteries? I think we should inconvenience these
    people as much as they do us. A while ago I was in Enid buying a printer
    cable adaptor and the guy asked me for my name.
    "Ghosseindhatsghabyfaird-johnson," I replied.
    (blank look of confusion)
    "How do you spell that?" he asked, obviously not wanting to know.
    "With a hyphen," I clarified
    "Once more?" he asked
    "Ghosseindhatsghabyfaird-johnson"
    "Could you please spell that?" he asked, glancing at the half dozen
    people waiting behind me.
    "Oh... just like it sounds," I said nonchalantly.
    Putting down "Johnson," he went on and asked about the address.
    "Washburn, Wisconsin, 14701 N.E. Wachatanoobee Parkway, Complex 3,
    Building O, Appt. more...

    A while back, over in Great Britain, a woman complained to the telephone company about her phone. Sometimes, it would not ring when someone called.
    The strange part, she said, was that when it did ring, the ring was invariably preceded by her dog barking. So she was convinced she had a broken telephone and a psychic dog.
    Now, in Britain, the ring signal is a high-voltage low-ampere current sent from the local office to the phone. The wire which carries this signal is run from the pole to a large metal spike in the yard, which grounds the circuit.
    In order to isolate the problem, the phone company sent a repairman out to climb the pole and manually send the signal down the wire. Sure enough, when he did this, nothing happened the first time. The second time, the dog barked just before the phone rang.
    Investigation revealed that the dog was chained (with an iron chain) to the spike that grounded the circuit. So this is what was happening: the ground was dry, preventing more...

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