"The Best Of Everything" joke

A Newfie goes to Toronto to seek his fortune, and after a couple of years is doing very well for himself. His brother calls from Newfoundland to tell him their father is very ill and probably won't survive.
"Well, if he dies I'll pay for the funeral; the best of everything, spare no expense, just send me the bill," says the Toronto Newfie.
Two weeks later he gets a bill in the mail for $7500.00
He sends the cheque off to his brother.
The following week he gets a bill for $75.00
He sends the cheque off to his brother.
The following week he gets another bill for $75.00
He sends the cheque off to his brother.
The following week he gets yet another bill for $75.00
He sends the cheque off to his brother.
The following week he gets a bill for $75.00
He calls his brother and says, "What the hell is going on; why do keep get a bill for $75.00 every week?"
His brother tells him, "Well, you said spare no expense, so we rented Dad a tux."

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

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What's the definition of an overbite?
When you're eating pussy and it tastes like shit!

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Scientists have invented, at the cost of $75 million in research, a robot that repels eyeliner, lipstick & mascara.
You couldn't make it up!

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TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!

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Your mamas so old, that when i told her to act her age she dropped dead!!!

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HKS:It's funny
Funny Joke? 22 vote(s). 73% are positive. 1 comment(s).