A big, strong man walks in a bar, and looks for his usual seat. He finds that there is a little man already sitting there, so asks him to move.
The little man refuses to get up, so the muscular man punches him and says, "That was a punch from Korea." The little man gets up and sits down again, so the muscular man kicks him and says, "That was a kick from China." The little man gets up one more time and sits down again, so the muscular man spin kicks him and says, "That was a spin kick from Japan." The little guy gives up and leaves.
30 minutes later the, the little man comes back. He finds that the big man who had beat him up was still there. So he walks up to him and hits him hard in the head. The muscular man is knocked out in the floor, so the little man tells the bartender, "When he wakes up, tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."
Sanath - Swings At Nearly Anything That's Hurled
Kambli - Killed All Mediocre Bowling, Left Immediately
Kapil - Killed Aspiring Pacemen In Land
Sohail - Swore Once, Heralding An Infamous Loss
Prasad - Promised Revenge Against Sohail And Delivered
More - Mouthing Obscene Rubbish Everywhere
Gavaskar - Grafting Away Valiantly, Always Successfully Killed Any Result, Goes Around Venting Angry Spiel Kicking About Rudely
Azhar - At Zenith Had Ambrose Reeling
Azharuddin - Almost Zaheer-like His Artistry, Rivetting Umpteen... Devoted Doting Indian Nationals
Vishy - Vodka Is Sweet, He Yells
Tendulkar - Tiny, Exciting, Neverending Dynamo Undyingly Labours, Keeps A Record
Amarnath - After Many A Reincarnation, Now Acknowledged Top Hand
Prasanna - Prince Radiant Among Spinners, Astutely Nailed Nimble Attackers
Bedi - Beautifully Executed Deliveries Indefinitely
Chandra - Cleverly Hides Another Nagging Delivery Really more...
(Be read when using the Willy voice in your head)
SUBJ: Clinton's Address to the Nation
Text from Clinton's Address to the Nation if he were on truth serum.
10.16 P.m. ET (0216 GMT) August 17, 1998
This afternoon in this room, from this chair, in this very spot, I was forced to testify before the Office of Independent Counsel and the grand jury.
I answered their questions truthfully whenever there was compelling physical evidence that would contradict my lies, including questions about having sex while watching an intern do kinky things that I now spin as being part of my private life, questions so embarrassing that no American citizen would ever want to answer.
Still, the polls indicate that I must take complete responsibility for all my actions, both public and private. And that is why I am speaking to you tonight and not ducking questions while the Marine Band plays loudly and drowns out the media.
As you know, in a deposition more...
The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.
Communist China is technologically underdeveloped because they have no alphabet. The lack of an alphabet means the Chinese cannot use acronyms; thus, they cannot communicate their ideas at a faster rate.
The 'Why Yawning Is Contagious' Theory: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures, so they must yawn to even it all out.
If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually produce all the world's great literary works in Braille.
A Blonde was soing laundry one day and while looking at the dergant it said to let the wash sit andd spin.
She retrives here sons sit and spin from the toy box and proceeds to place it on top of the washer.
Shortly after her husband finds her with a broken leg lying on the floor and he asked what happened.
She replied, "I broke the sit and spin cycle."