Head Jokes

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    Helicopter Grenade

    Hot 6 days ago

    There are three guys in a helicopter and they each get to choose what they want to throw out.
    The first guys chooses an apple. So he takes an apple and throws it out.
    The second guy chooses a brick. So he takes a brick and throws it out.
    The third guy chooses a grenade. So he pulls the pin and throws it out.
    They land a while later and are walking along when they find a man rubbing his head.
    They ask, "
    What happened to you?"
    He answers, "
    An apple hit me on the head."
    They're walking along again and find a man lying unconcious on the ground.
    They ask the cop, "
    What happened to him?"
    He answers, "
    A brick hit him on the head."
    They're walking again, when they find a man laughing histerically.
    They ask, "
    What happened to you?"
    He answers, "
    I farted and the house blew up behind me!"

    A Blonde airhead goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer starts with the basics. "So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?" The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for half a minute before replying "Ehhhh... 22!" The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell us your height, please?" The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces "Five foot two!" This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something the interviewee won't have to count, measure, or lookup. "Just to confirm for our records, your name please?" The airhead bobs her head from side to side for about ten seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying "MANDY!" The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he more...

    In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft.
    After one year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex.
    After the US published the study, France decided to do their own study.
    After $250,000, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.
    Poland, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study.
    After 2 weeks and a cost of around $75.46, they concluded that it was to keep man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.

    A truck driver stopped for a meal at and was just served when a huge caravan of Hells Angels roared in. As the gang entered the restraunt, everyone but the truck driver quickly paid thier bills and left. The truck driver quietly sat there eating his steak.
    The leader of the Hells Angels marched in and sat by the trucker at the bar, reached over and took his plate and began to eat the steak. Still unruffled, the trucker sat there quietly and drank his coffee. This infuriated the gang leader who grabbed the coffee and poured it on the trucker's head. Calmly the trucker wiped his head and walked to the cashier. Amid jears and insults from the gang the trucker paid his bill and left.
    When the waitress came to take their order, the gang leader remarked, "Boy, that guy wasn't much of a man was he. I stole his steak, called his mother a bitch, and even poured coffee on his head. And the whimp, he just walked away."
    The waitress replied, "Yea, I guess your right. more...

    An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life.Italian: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild.Frenchman: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in chocolate, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild.Aussie: When I finish making love to my wife, I get out of bed and wipe my dick on the curtains, and my wife...she goes wild!

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