Close Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Eiffel Tower

    Hot 1 year ago

    A boy of 6 years old never pays attention to his pant's zipper...which is always being left open. Because of this his mother often gets angry.
    One day some of his relatives plan to visit their city, so his mother advised him that whenever she tells him to "close the Eiffel Tower", it means that he has to close his zipper.
    His relatives arrive, and after some time, the boy asked his aunti, "Aunti, why did you come here?"
    His aunti answered, "Dear boy, we came here to see the Eiffel Tower."
    The boy said in great excitement, pointing towards his zipper, "But aunti, the Eiffel Tower is closed."
    Aunti replied, "My boy, that is the small Eiffel Tower. I came here to see big one."
    The boy answered politely, "Aunti, then I will have to call my dad."

    Animals of the jungle

    Hot 4 years ago

    1 How do you fit an elephant into your fridge within 3 steps?
    2 How do you fit a zebra in your fridge?
    3 King of the jungle, the lion every animal in the jungle will come to his wedding but one animal won't which one is it?
    4 A man needs to get to the other side of a bridge desperately there are killer alligators that live in the river and there is no boat how do you get across??
    1. step 1- open the fridge.
    step 2- put elephant in the fridge.
    step 3- close the fridge.
    2. step 1- open the fridge.
    step 2- take the elephant out.
    step 3- put the zebra in.
    step 4- close the fridge.
    3. The zebra because it is in the fridge.
    4. Swim because the alligators are at the wedding.

    Unengaged Brain

    Hot 6 years ago

    A blonde goes into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother in Poland. The man tells her it will be $300. She exclaims, "I don't have any money, but I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother in Poland!!!"To that the man asks, "Anything??"And the blonde says, "Yes, anything!!"With that, the man says, "Follow me."He walks into the next room and tells her, "Come in and close the door."She does.He then says, "Get on your knees."She does.He then says, "Take down my zipper."She does.He then says, "Go ahead, take it out."With that she takes it out and takes hold of it with both hands.The man then says, "Well, go ahead!"She brings her mouth closer to it, and while holding it close to her lips, she says, "Hello...Mom?"

    Nate the Snake

    Hot 5 years ago

    One fine day, Nate the Snake was slithering through the forest when he came upon a level on a tree. The lever said "IF YOU PULL THIS LEVER, THE WORLD WILL END". Now, Nate was a curious fellow, but was smart enough to know not to pull the lever. So, he decided to make it his duty to stand by the lever and warn the other animals that came by of the danger, since he knew most of them weren't as smart.
    The day wore on, and animal after animal came and went. Each one wanted to pull the lever, but Nate warned them of the danger.
    Soon, the day drew to a close, and Nate began slithering toward his home, when an eighteen wheeler sped by, and upset an area of several large boulders that was very close to the tree.
    One broke away, and began speeding toward the tree in such a way that it would hit the lever and end the world if it was not stopped. But no large animal was there to help, and Nate knew what he had to do.
    Nate curled himself up into a tight little coil in more...

    Elephant Joke

    Hot 3 years ago

    Q: What do you call an elephant wearing pink earmuffs and a dress?
    A: Anything you want, it can't hear you.
    Q: Why is an elephant big, grey, and wrinkly?
    A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.
    Q: What's grey and white on the inside and red on the outside?
    A: An inside out elephant.
    Q: What is grey and not there.
    A: No elephants.
    Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
    A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
    Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
    A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
    Q: How do you shoot a green elephant?
    A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
    Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
    A: Ever seen a yellow elephant? (Stup-pid, fuul, idyut!)
    Q: Why are elephants wrinkled?
    A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
    Q: Why did more...

  • Recent Activity