Slide Jokes / Recent Jokes

there was a english man irish man scots & man they all went to a
magic slide the english man goes down the slide and wishes for a pot of gold and lands in a pot of gold the scottish went down the slide and wishes for a pot of silver and lands in a pot of silver the irish man goes down the slide and gose weeeeeeeee and lands in a buckit of wee !!!
by louis nicholson

an irishman englishman and scottishman went to the park and saw a magic slide the irishman went down the slide saying gold and landed in gold the englishman went down saying silver and landed in silver but the scottishman did not know the lide was magic and went wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I slide to first.
I feel like I'm going to burst.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to two.
My pants are filled with goo.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to third.
I dropped a runny turd.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to home.
My pants are filled with foam.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
First its in the pants, then its on the floor.
I make a 20 yard dash to the bathroom door.
Some people think its funny.
Its coming out back runny.
Well, diarrhea.

One day, there was a powerful slide, and when you go down on it, you wish for something and you get it. One guy goes down the slide, and says, "A pot of gold," and he gets it. Another guy goes down and says, "A pot of silver," and he gets it. The third guy says, "Weeee," and he gets a pot of wee!

There was a Scottish man, an Irish man and a stupid man one day they came across a magic slide. So if you slide down it and shouted out anything in the world, you would land in that thing, so the Scottish man went down the slide and shouted "lager" and he landed in a pool of lager.
The Irish man went down and shouted "money". He landed in a pot of money.
The stupid man went down the slide and shouted "Ahhhhh weeeeee"....and I think you know what happened next!!!

There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything, both ways save us from thinking.

A Slide Rule doesn't shut down abruptly when it gets too hot.
One hundred people all using Slide Rules and Paper Pads do not start wailing and screaming due to a single-point failure.
A Slide Rule doesn't smoke whenever the power supply hiccups.
A Slide Rule doesn't care if you smoke, or hiccup.
You can spill coffee on a Slide Rule; you can use a Slide Rule while completely submerged in coffee.
You never get nasty system messages about filling up your entire paper quota with pointless GIF pictures for the root window.
A Slide Rule and Paper Pad fit in a briefcase with space left over for lunch or a change of underwear.
A properly used Slide Rule can perform pipelined *and* parallel operations. (Okay, you need a guru for this.)
You don't get junk mail offering pricey software upgrades that fix current floating point errors while introducing new ones.
A Slide Rule doesn't need scheduled hardware maintenance.
A Paper Pad supports text and graphics more...