Meek Jokes / Recent Jokes

The meek shall inherit the earth. After we're through with it.

Mr. Weissenblat, a middle-aged meek Jew, is on a plane for Israel, in a window
seat. Just before take-off, this HUGE Arab wearing a beautiful gaudy multi-
coloured gown walks up and sits down beside him. A few minutes later, the
plane takes off.
All is well. For a while. But then, Mr. Weissenblat realizes that he has to go
to the washroom. That wouldn't be a problem, but he looks over and notices that
the Arab beside him is sound asleep, and Mr. Weissenblat, being a meek man is
afraid to disturb him. So he figures he'll hold it in till the Arab wakes up.
But as luck would have it, the Arab just keeps snoring away, and Mr. Weiseenbalt
is feeling increasingly more uncomfortable. After a while, he starts to feel
nauseous as well, what from holding it in combined with the plane ride. He
tries and tries to hold it in, but then "AAARRGGHH!!"-he throws up all over
the Arab and his beautiful garment. He thinks, "Oh, no! Now he's more...

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train.
The longer the title the less important the job.
The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on.
The meek shall inherit the earth, but only after we’re done with it.
The meek shall inherit the earth, but not it’s mineral rights.
The moment for calm and rational discussion is past; now is the time for senseless bickering.
The more an item costs, the farther you have to send it for repairs.
The more directives you issue to solve a problem, the worse it gets.
The more ridiculous a belief system, the higher probability of its success.
The more things change, the more they stay insane.

Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Vatican Rescinds' Blessed' Status of World's Meek-' Screw the Meek,' Says Pope
VATICAN CITY--In a historic reversal of its nearly 2, 000-year-old pro-meek stance, the Catholic Church announced Tuesday that it is permanently rescinding the traditional "blessed" status of the world's meek.
"Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ once said,' Blessed are the meek,'" said Pope John Paul II in a papal bull read before the College of Cardinals. "However, there has always been a tacit understanding between the Church and the meek that this' blessed' status was conditional upon their inheritance of the Earth, an event which seems unlikely to happen anytime in the foreseeable future. Our relationship, therefore, must be terminated."
"Screw the meek," the pope added.
Citing "two millennia of inaction and non-achievement" by the world's impoverished and downtrodden, the pope contended that the meek's historic inability to improve more...

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train. The longer the title the less important the job. The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on. The meek shall inherit the earth, but only after we`re done with it. The meek shall inherit the earth, but not it`s mineral rights. The moment for calm and rational discussion is past; now is the time for senseless bickering. The more an item costs, the farther you have to send it for repairs. The more directives you issue to solve a problem, the worse it gets. The more ridiculous a belief system, the higher probability of its success. The more things change, the more they stay insane.

Blessed are the meek for they shall inhibit the earth.