Historic Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Then: Swallowing acid Now: Swallowing antacid Then: You’re growing pot Now: Your growing pot Then: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your parents Now: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your kids Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor Now: Trying not to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor Then: Passing the driving test Now: Passing the vision test Then: Seeds and stems Now: Roughage Then: Popping pills, smoking joints Now: Popping joints Then: Whatever? Now: Depends Then: Ommmmmm Now: Ummmmm Then: Our president’s struggle with Fidel Now: Our president’s struggle with fidelity

    John McCain said that sending less than 40,000 troops to Afghanistan "would be an error of historic proportions." Perhaps we should take heed of McCain, who chose Sarah Palin, making him an expert on " errors of historic proportions."

    1970: Long Hair
    2000: Longing for hair

    1970: The perfect high.
    2000: The perfect high yield mutual fund.

    1970: Keg.
    2000: EKG.

    1970: Acid Rock.
    2000: Acid Reflux.

    1970: Moving to California because it's cool.
    2000: Moving to California because it's warm.

    1970: Growing pot.
    2000: Growing pot belly.

    1970: Douglas Street bridge.
    2000: Dental bridge.

    1970: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
    2000: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.

    1970: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
    2000: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.

    1970: Seeds and stems.
    2000: Roughage.

    1970: Popping pills, smoking joints.
    2000: Popping joints.

    1970: Our president's struggle with Fidel.
    2000: Our president's struggle with fidelity.

    1970: more...

    The last one is clearly the most expensive.

    Most Expensive Car Wrecks The biggest loser?

    #5. Bugatti Veyron. .. $1.6 Million
    The Bugatti Veyron is the most expensive production car in history. Only 300 are expected to be produced, and already two have crashed. Above is the first one. The driver thought it was okay to speed at 100 mph in the rain. He only had the car for one week.

    #4. 1959 Ferrari 250 GT TDF. .. $1.65 Million
    This extremely rare classic car, the 1959 Ferrari 250 GT "Tour de France", crashed into a wall at the Shell Ferrari-Maserati Historic Challenge in 2003.

    #3. Ferrari 250 GT Spyder. .. $10.9 Million
    The record price for a 1961 250 GT California Spyder at auction was set on May 18, 2008 when a black one was sold for $10,894,900. So what is one doing buried in the sand? The unlucky owner had it stored near the beach when a Hurricane hit.

    #2. Ferrari 250 GTO. .. $28.5 Million
    The more...

    Then: Long Hair
    Now: Longing for hair

    Then: The perfect high.
    Now: The perfect high yield mutual fund.

    Then: Keg.
    Now: EKG.

    Then: Acid Rock.
    Now: Acid Reflux.

    Then: Moving to California because it's cool.
    Now: Moving to California because it's warm.

    Then: Growing pot.
    Now: Growing pot belly.

    Then: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
    Now: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.

    Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
    Now: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.

    Then: Seeds and stems.
    Now: Roughage.

    Then: Popping pills, smoking joints.
    Now: Popping joints, aching joints.

    Then: Our president's struggle with Fidel.
    Now: Our president's struggle with Fidel.

    Then: Paar.
    Now: AARP.

    Then: Killer weed.
    Now: Weed more...

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