"An Arab and a Jew" joke
Mr. Weissenblat, a middle-aged meek Jew, is on a plane for Israel, in a window
seat. Just before take-off, this HUGE Arab wearing a beautiful gaudy multi-
coloured gown walks up and sits down beside him. A few minutes later, the
plane takes off.
All is well. For a while. But then, Mr. Weissenblat realizes that he has to go
to the washroom. That wouldn't be a problem, but he looks over and notices that
the Arab beside him is sound asleep, and Mr. Weissenblat, being a meek man is
afraid to disturb him. So he figures he'll hold it in till the Arab wakes up.
But as luck would have it, the Arab just keeps snoring away, and Mr. Weiseenbalt
is feeling increasingly more uncomfortable. After a while, he starts to feel
nauseous as well, what from holding it in combined with the plane ride. He
tries and tries to hold it in, but then "AAARRGGHH!!"-he throws up all over
the Arab and his beautiful garment. He thinks, "Oh, no! Now he's gonna kill
me!" and sits there in apprehension waiting for the Arab to wake up.
Finally, the Arab wakes up, and finds all this vomit all over him.
Mr. Weissenblat says to him, "Well, do you fell better now?"
An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day more...