Dealing Jokes / Recent Jokes

Nan

Hot 8 years agoby Funny gal

Finding the police at the door cause Nans been dealing

A few years ago Charlie brown and the peanuts gang made a new friend who developed leukemia in an animated special entitled, "why me, Charlie Brown?"
Recently MetLife put out a series of instructional pamphlets which feature the gang dealing contemporary problems.
Now that Charlie Brown is dealing with important issues how about Peanuts specials for kids of the 90:
We learn about VD in:
"IT BURNS WHEN I PEE, CHARLIE BROWN"
Chuck & the little red-headed girl learn about unwanted pregnancy in:
"ITS BLUE, CHARLIE BROWN!"
Is Linus gay?
"ITS A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE, CHARLIE BROWN"
See how the Peanuts Gang deals with date rape in:
"NO MEANS NO CHARLIE BROWN!"
Discover a father's forbidden love in:
"ITS OUR LITTLE SECRET CHARLIE BROWN"
Franklin speaks! The Peanuts gang gets a lesson in Ebonics in:
"IMO BUSTA CAP INYO ASS, CHARLIE BROWN"
What goes on the more...

Couldn't find his way through a maze even if the rats helped him. Couldn't hit sand if he fell off a camel. Couldn't hit the broad side of a barn if he were standing inside. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel. Couldn't think/pee his way out of a paper bag. Couldn't write dialog for a porno flick. CPU is always in powersave mode. CPU not connected to the bus. Cranial cavity filled with neutronic matter. (Really dense.) Cranio-rectally inverted. Cunning as a dodo bird. Cursor's flashing but there's no response. Dealing with him is less fun than going to the dentist. Dealing with him is one angst worse than a blind date. Deep as her dimples / reflection in a mirror. Defective hard drive / boot sector. Dense as a London fog. Diarrhea of the mouth constipation of the ideas. Differently clued. - Dave Clark Dock doesn't quite reach the water. Does aerobics... in his head. Does everything the hard way, like making love standing up in a hammock. Doesn't adjust for more...

Dealing with failure is easy: Work hard to improve. Success is also easy to handle: You've solved the wrong problem. Work hard to improve.

Couldn’t find his way through a maze even if the rats helped him.
Couldn’t hit sand if he fell off a camel.
Couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn if he were standing inside.
Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Couldn’t think/pee his way out of a paper bag.
Couldn’t write dialog for a porno flick.
CPU is always in powersave mode.
CPU not connected to the bus.
Cranial cavity filled with neutronic matter. (Really dense.)
Cranio-rectally inverted.
Cunning as a dodo bird.
Cursor’s flashing but there’s no response.
Dealing with him is less fun than going to the dentist.
Dealing with him is one angst worse than a blind date.
Deep as her dimples / reflection in a mirror.