Stripes Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two good old boys, Bubba and Junior have been promoted from Privates to Sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Bubba says,
"Hey, Junior, there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in and have a drink."
"But we's privates," protests Junior.
"We's sergeants now," says Bubba, pulling him inside.
"Now, Junior, I'm gonna sit down and have me a drink."
"But, we's privates," says Junior.
"You blind, boy?" asks Bubba, pointing at his stripes. "We's Sergeants now."
So they order their drinks and pretty soon a hooker comes up to Bubba.
"You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to take you someplace and make you feel good - but I've got a bad case of gonorrhea."
Bubba pulls his friend to the side and whispers,
"Junior, go look in the dictionary and see what gonorrhea means. If it's okay, give me the okay sign."
Junior goes to look it up, more...

Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white
stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't
know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did
and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other
zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are
what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black
stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises their hand. The teacher says, “See it’s long neck? What animal has a long neck? ” Sally holds up her hand and asks “is it a giraffe? ” “Very good Sally, ” the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. None of the students holds up their hands. “See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes? ” Billy holds up his hand and says, “It’s a zebra. ” “Very good Billy, ” the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students recognized the animal. “See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this? ” Still no one guesses. “Let me give you another hint, it’s something your mother calls your father. ” Little Johnny shouts out, “Is it a horny bastard? ”

Two good ol' boys, Bubba and Junior get promoted from Privates to Sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Bubba says, "Hey, Junior - there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in and have us a drank." "But we's privates," protests Junior." NO, we's sergeants now," says Bubba, pulling him inside"Now, Junior, I'm gonna sit down and have me a drank." "But, we's privates," says Junior." You blind, boy!" says Bubba, pointing at his stripes. "We's Sergeants now!"So they order their drinks and pretty soon a hooker comes up to Bubba." You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to take you someplace and make you feel good -- but I've got a bad case of gonorrhea." Bubba pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Junior, go look in the dictionary and see what that gonorrhea means. If it's good, give me the okay sign." Junior goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Bubba the big okay more...

A zebra dies goes to heaven. When checking in, he tells St. Peter,
"Say, I have always wanted to know if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes."
St. Peter, "I can't answer that question...but see God walking around over there? Ask him."
Zebra to God, "God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?"
God looks at the zebra sagely and states, "You are what you are."
Frustrated, the zebra returns to St. Peter.
What did He say," asks S.P.
"Oh,," replies the zebra. "He just said, 'You are what you are,' and I still don't know whether I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes."
"Oh, that's easy," says S.P. "You are white with black stripes."
"How do you know?" asks the zebra. "Well," says S.P., "if you were black with white stripes he would have said 'you is what you is.'"

A zebra dies goes to heaven. When checking in, he tells St. Peter,"Say, I have always wanted to know if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes."St. Peter, "I can't answer that question...but see God walking around over there? Ask him." Zebra to God, "God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?"God looks at the zebra sagely and states, "You are what you are."Frustrated, the zebra returns to St. Peter.What did He say," asks S.P."Oh,," replies the zebra. "He just said, 'You are what you are,' and I still don't know whether I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes.""Oh, that's easy," says S.P. "You are white with black stripes.""How do you know?" asks the zebra. "Well," says S.P., "if you were black with white stripes he would have said 'you is what you is.'"

A zebra went to heaven. When he saw St. Peter he asked him "You know, I have always wondered, am I a white horse with black stripes or a black horse with white stripes?" St. Peter said he would have to ask God that question since he's the one that made him.
So the zebra asked God, "God, am I a white horse with black stripes or a black horse with white stripes?"
God answered, "You are what you are." The zebra left and came upon St. Peter and told him,
"Well I asked God if I was a white horse with black stripes or a black horse with white stripes..."
"What was the answer," St. Peter asked. "Well I still don't know. All He said was: 'You are what you are."' "Well that answers it," Said St. Peter. "You're a white horse with black stripes." "How do you know that?" asked the zebra. "Well if you were a black horse with white stripes He would have said: "You is what you is".