Black Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

    OK, You're a woman, walking home alone. You suddenly notice you are being followed by a black man. What steps would you take?

    Fucking long ones!

    Once there were 3 guys, a Cuban, an American, and an Italian. So they worked together, and it was lunch time, so the American opens his lunch box and sees peanut-butter and jelly sandwich and he says, "If I get a peanut-butter jelly sandwich one more time I'm going to kill myself."
    Then the Italian opens his lunch box and sees spaghetti and he says, "If I get spaghetti one more time I'm going to kill myself."
    Lastly, the Cuban opens his lunch and sees black beans and he says, "If I get black beans one more time, I'm going to to do the same.
    The next day the all open their lunch boxes, and the Cuban sees black beans again, so he kills himself, then the Italian sees spaghetti again, so he kills himself also. Lastly, the American sees peanut-butter and jelly sandwich again so he kills himself too.
    Then, at the funeral, their wifes are talking and the American wife says "Oh..! he should at least told me about his lunch, that way he wouldn't more...

    A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her were 200 women walking single file. The woman couldn't stand the curiosity. She respectfully approached the woman walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?" The woman replied, "Well, that first hearse is for my husband." "What happened to him?" The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him." She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?" The woman answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my husband when the dog turned on her." A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed more...

    Ah Beng went for an job interview for a sales job. When the manager saw Ah Beng's colourful attire, his mind screamed, "Not this man!!"
    Nevertheless he still had to entertain Ah Beng. So he told Ah Beng, "If you can form a sentence using the words I give you, then I will give you a chance!"
    "The words are "Green, Pink, Yellow, Blue, White, Purple, Black".
    Ah Beng thought for a while and said "I heard the phone go green, green, and then I went to pink up the phone and said Yellow. Blue's that? White did you say? Sorry, wrong number. Don't purplely disturb people and don't call Black, ok?"
    Ah Beng got the job.

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