Hawaii Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man was walking along a Florida beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it, and out popped a genie.
The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month, and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three... You only get one wish!"
The man sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm scared to fly, and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!!
Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete -- how much steel!! No, think of another wish."
The man said, "OK, I'll try to think of a really good wish."
Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't more...
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents
I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get
messed up by being near the window.
A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going
over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to
explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she
interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape
Town is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the
stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown
is in Africa." Her response... click.
A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room. I tried more...
A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said,
' 'OK. You released me from the lamp, blah, blah, blah. This is the fourth time this month and I''m getting a little sick of these wishes, so you can forget about three. You only get one wish.''
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said,
' 'I''ve always wanted to go to Hawaii but I''m scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?''
The genie laughed and said,' 'That''s impossible. Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete... how much steel! No, think of another wish.''
The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said,
' 'I''ve been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don''t care more...
Two doctors found themselves on the beach in Hawaii. As a real bevy of bikini-clad females walked by, one said,"Look at the legs among that group." "Sorry old chap." replied the second doctor. "But I'm achest man myself."
A man was walking along a Florida beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it, and out popped a genie.
The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month, and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three... You only get one wish!"
The man sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm scared to fly, and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!!
Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete - how much steel! No, think of another wish."
The man said, "OK, I'll try to think of a really good wish."
Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care more...
A phsyciatrist is walking down a beach in Hawaii when she tripped over something. She went back to see what it was and found that it was a lamp. She picked it up and a genie popped out. The genie said "For freeing me I will grant you one wish." "Alright, " said the phsyciatrist " I want a highway from California to Hawaii." "Are you serious," The genie exclaimed "Think of all the concrete it would need all the pilings and all that jazz, that would take forever!" "OK then," said the phsyciatrist "I want to understand my patients know whats up with them," and the phsyciatrist goes on and on with what she wants " You read me" " Uhhuh " said the genie " So do you want two lanes or four?"
A man finds a lamp and rubs it and out pops a genie. The genie says that he will grant the man one wish. The man thinks for a minute and says, "You know, I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm afraid of flying. So my wish is that you build a road to Hawaii." The genie thought about that and said to the man, "I don't think I can grant this wish. All the asphalt and supplies to make the roads, tunnels, and bridges. Not to mention the amount of time and work it would take. That's just too much work. So, no, make another wish." The man thought for a moment and said, "Well, something else I would really like is to know what goes on inside a woman's head. I want to understand women. You know, what makes them laugh, what makes them cry, why they get mad, why they are happy. Just overall, what makes them tick." The genie looked at the man and said, "Two lanes or four?"