Collie Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Puppy Love

    Hot 2 years ago

    The taco Bell chihuahua dog, a doberman, and a bulldog all walk into a bar. A female collie then walks in. The collie says, ''Whoever can say liver and cheese the most creativly, can have me. So the bulldog goes ''I love liver and cheese'' The collie says ''Not good enough'' The doberman says ''I hate liver and cheese'' The collie goes, ''Not creative enough'' Then the chihuahua dog says, ''Liver alone, cheese mine.''

    Dogs and Light Bulbs

    Hot 2 months ago

    Border Collie: Just one. Then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
    Rottweiler: Make me!
    Lab: Oh, me, me! Pleeease let me change the light bulb! Can I? Huh? Huh?
    Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
    Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
    Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls.
    Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
    Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
    Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there!
    Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb?
    Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
    Basset Hound: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
    Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
    Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a more...

    Dog Breeds that did not make it:
    Deerhound + Terrier
    Derriere, a dog that's true to the end
    Spitz + Chow Chow
    Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot
    Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier
    Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries
    Great Pyrenees + Dachshund
    Pyradachs, a puzzling breed
    Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso
    Peekasso, an abstract dog
    Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel
    Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle
    Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever
    Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists
    Newfoundland + Basset Hound
    Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors
    Terrier + Bulldog
    Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes
    Bloodhound + Labrador
    Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly
    Malamute + Pointer
    Moot Point, owned by...oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway
    Collie + Malamute
    Commute, a dog that travels to work with you
    Bloodhound + Borzoi
    Bloody Bore, a more...

    How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
    Border Collie: Just one. Then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
    Rottweiler: Make me!
    Lab: Oh, me, me! Pleeease let me change the light bulb! Can I? Huh? Huh?
    Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
    Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
    Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls.
    Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
    Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
    Mastiff: Screw it yourself! I'm not afraid of the dark...
    Doberman: While it's out, I'll just take a nap on the couch.
    Boxer: Who needs light? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
    Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there!
    Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb?
    Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
    Old English Sheep dog: Light bulb? That more...

    How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. Then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code. Rottweiler: Make me! Lab: Oh, me, me! Pleeease let me change the light bulb! Can I? Huh? Huh? Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp! Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares? Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark. Mastiff: Screw it yourself! I'm not afraid of the dark... Doberman: While it's out, I'll just take a nap on the couch. Boxer: Who needs light? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark. Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there! Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb? Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle... Old English Sheep dog: Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb? Basset Hound: more...

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