Mickey Jokes / Recent Jokes
The judge said to Mickey "I can not grant you a divorce from Minney, there is no evidence that she is crazy" and Mickey said, "I didnt say she was crazy, I said she was fuckin' Goofy!"
Minnie is sitting in the chair and the Judge asks Mickey
"So...U say minnie is crazy?"
Mickey replies "No, I said shes fucking Goofy!"
Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse.
Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. "I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane..."
Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was mentally insane, I said that she's fucking goofy!"
Big Bad Wolf:
The big bad wolf said to Little Red Riding Hood, "unbutton your blouse and let me suck your tits." "Fuck off," she replied as she tugged down her panties. "Eat me, like the fuckin' book says."
Pinocchio:
Pinocchio was fed up with the recent complaints from his wife. "Every time we make love, I get splinters."
So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gepetto the Carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter, "that's what you need." Pinocchio took the sandpaper home. A few weeks later, the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again.
"How are you getting along with the girls now?" "Who needs girls?" replied Pinocchio.
Cinderella:
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on two more...
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Mickey!
Mickey who?
Mickey is lost so that's why I'm knocking!
Charlie was playing with his little brother Mickey when the little boy asked whether he could fly like Superman."Sure you can, Mickey," Charlie said, "Just flap your armsreally *really* hard." So Mickey climbed up on the windowsill, started flapping like mad, jumped, then smashed into the ground six stories below.Horrified, their mother came screaming into the room and said, "What the hell happened?!?"Charlie said, "I was just teaching Mickey not to believeeverything someone tells him."