Acquainted Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Major Scandal during their presidency....
    Nixon: Watergate
    Clinton: Waterbed
    The President's biggest fear...
    Nixon: The Cold War
    Clinton: The Cold Sore
    Complaints toward the President...
    Nixon: Carpet-Bombing
    Clinton: Carpet-Burns
    Their Vice-Presidents...
    Nixon: His was Greek
    Clinton: His is a Geek.
    Presidential qualities...
    Nixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger.
    Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing her.
    Things the President couldn't explain...
    Nixon: The missing 18-minutes on the tapes
    Clinton: The 36D bra in his briefcase
    Job titles....
    Nixon: Ex-President
    Clinton: Sex-President
    Slogans....
    Nixon: Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One"
    Clinton: Known for women pointing at him and saying "He's the one"
    Known for....
    Nixon: Famous for his widow's peak
    Clinton: Famous for bringing widows to their peak
    Acquaintances....
    Nixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon more...

    A couple of weeks before being sworn in, George W. Bush was invited to a get acquainted tour of the White House. After drinking several glasses of iced tea, he asked Bill Clinton if he could use his personal bathroom.
    He was astonished to see that the President had a solid gold urinal. That afternoon, George told his wife, Laura, about the urinal. "Just think," he said," when I am President, I'll get to have a gold urinal!"
    Later, when Laura had lunch with Hillary at her tour of the White House, she told Hillary how impressed George had been with his discovery of the fact that, in the President's private bathroom, the president had a gold urinal.
    That evening, Bill and Hillary were getting ready for bed. Hillary turned to Bill and said, "Well, I found out who pissed in your saxophone."

    "Similarities between presidents Richard Nixon and Bill Clinton": Nixon: Watergate Clinton: Water BedNixon: His biggest fear: the Cold War Clinton: His biggest fear: a Cold SoreNixon: Carpet bombing Clinton: Carpet burnsNixon: His Vice President was a Greek Clinton: His Vice President is a geekNixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing herNixon: Couldn't explain the 18-minute gap in the Watergate tape Clinton: Couldn't explain the 38-DD bra in his briefcaseNixon: His nickname was Tricky Dick Clinton: No differenceNixon: Ex-President Clinton: Sex-PresidentNixon: Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One" Clinton: Know for women pointing at him and say "He's the one"Nixon: Famous for his widow's peak Clinton: Famous for bringing widows to their peakNixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy Clinton: Well acquainted with G SpotNixon: Talked about achieving peace with honor Clinton: Talked of getting a piece while on her

    Nixon:Watergate
    Clinton:Waterbed
    Nixon:His biggest fear - the Cold War
    Clinton:His biggest fear - a Cold Sore
    Nixon:Worried about carpet bombs
    Clinton:Worried about carpet burns
    Nixon:His Vice President was a Greek
    Clinton:His Vice President is a geek
    Nixon:Couldn't stop Kissinger
    Clinton:Couldn't stop kissing her
    Nixon:Couldn't explain the 18 minute gap in the Watergate tape
    Clinton:Couldn't explain the 36-DD bra in his brief case
    Nixon:His nickname was Tricky Dick
    Clinton:same
    Nixon:Ex-President
    Clinton:Sex-President
    Nixon:Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One"
    Clinton:Known for women pointing at him saying, "He's the one!"
    Nixon:Famous for his widow's peak
    Clinton:Famous for bringing widows to their peak
    Nixon:Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy
    Clinton:Well acquainted with the G Spot
    Nixon:Took on Ho Chi Minh
    Clinton:Took on Ho
    Nixon:Talked about achieving more...

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