Pan Jokes / Recent Jokes

Sardaar Went For Interview In A Hardware Shop For The Post Of Sales Man.
The Manager Of The Shop Asked A Question:
"In A Weighing Balance, On One Pan 10 Kilo Iron Block Is Kept. On The Other Pan 10 Kilo Cotton Is Kept. Kaun Sa Side Neechey Jaayega?"

Sardaarji Scratched His Head For A Few Minutes............ And Said
"Iron Waala Side Neechey Jaayega"
"Kyun" Asked The Manager.
"Kyunki Loha (Iron) Kaapuz Se Jyada Bhari Hota Hai..........."

A young woman was preparing a ham dinner. After she cut off the end of the ham, she placed it in a pan for baking. Her friend asked her,"Why did you cut off the end of the ham"? And she replied, "I really don't know but my mother always did, so I thought you were supposed to."

Later when talking to her mother she asked her why she cut off the end of the ham before baking it, and her mother replied,"I really don't know, but that's the way my mom always did it."

A few weeks later while visiting her grandmother, the young woman asked, "Grandma, why is it that you cut off the end of a ham before you bake it?"

Her grandmother replied, "Well dear, it would never fit into my baking pan."

Two eggs are sitting in a frying pan. The first egg turns too the other and says, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?"
Then the second egg exclaims "AH! It's a talking egg!!!"

A coocker told a pan you are so black. Then pan said then why did you look at me and whistle.

The Redneck Oil Change Checklist

1. Go to O'Reilly auto parts and write a check for $50 dollars for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and scented tree.

2. Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it back to O'Reilly to recycle, dump in hole in back yard.

3. Open a beer and drink it.

4. Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.

5. Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.

6. In frustration, open another beer and drink it.

7. Place drain pan under engine.

8. Look for 9/16 box end wrench.

9. Give up and use crescent wrench.

10. Unscrew drain plug.

11. Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil; get hot oil on you in process.

12. Clean up.

13. Have another beer while oil is draining.

14. Look for oil filter wrench.

15. Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist it off.

16. more...

Oil Change instructions for Women:

1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil change.
2) Drink a cup of coffee.
3) 15 minutes later write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.

Money spent:
Change $ 20. 00
Coffee 1. 00
Total $ 21. 00

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Oil Change instructions for Men:
1) Go to auto parts store and write a check for $50. 00 for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.
2) Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it
back to be recycled, dump in hole in back yard.
3) Open a beer and drink it
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9) Give up and more...

One day, Jerry Aught, who liked to get drunk, did just that. When he got home, his wife, Sherry Aught, would get mad. One day, Sherry said,"If you come home drunk again, I will hit you on the head with this frying pan".

The next day, Jerry came home drunk again.As he lay on the doormat,Sherry came out with the frying pan. Jerry started to sing: "swing low, sweet Sherry Aught, coming to carry me home..."