Foley Jokes / Recent Jokes

"I was dismayed and shocked to learn about Congressman Foley's unacceptable behavior," the President said at a California elementary school named after himself.
"I was disgusted by the revelations and disappointed that he would violate the trust of the citizens. Who does this guy think he is-me?"

The Mark Foley scandal has entered a new phase. Foley has claimed his alcoholism and being molested as a teenager caused him to send sexually explicit emails to underage male Congressional pages. Mr. Foley's lawyer has just released a new list of causes for his client's pervy ways:
• Lactose Intolerance
• Vertigo
• Flat Feet
• Sleep Apnea
• Peanut Allergy
• Body Image Issues
• Epstein-Barr Syndrome
• Astigmatism
• Less Than Perfect Credit
• Toothache
• Toxic Mold
• Dyslexia
• 9/11
Stay tuned for more late-breaking developments and excuses in this case.

From CNN link: A priest whom former Rep. Mark Foley reportedly accused of molestation almost four decades ago said Thursday that he fondled the lawmaker as a teen, but the priest said it wasn't abuse because Foley "seemed to like it."

"I would say that if I offended him, I am sorry, but to remember the good time we had together, you know?" he said. "And how really we enjoyed each other's company. And to let bygones be bygones. Don't keep dwelling on this thing, you know?"
This opens up a whole new legal defense strategy.

Two older women were picking up a third friend for their weekly lunch when they accidentally ran over and killed her cat. It wasn't a pretty sight, so rather than leave it for the woman's husband to find, they scooped it into a Foley's bag and took it with them, intending to throw it away in the restaurant's dumpster.Upon their arrival, they discovered that the dumpster was locked. Not wanting to leave the bag in the car, they put in on the ground next to the car and went inside to eat. From their window table they could clearly see the car and bag, and so noticed immediately when a woman walked by the closed bag, looked at it with interest, and went on. In a few minutes she returned, looked a little more closely, glanced around to see if she were being watched, and strolled on. On her third pass, she casually picked up the bag without pausing, and continued on - into the restaurant! She let herself be seated, placed the bag and her purse on the floor next to her chair, and picked up more...

Dennis Hastert was reportedly aware of Congressman Foley's behavior when his top aide returned to tell him that the pages were stuck together.