Dental Jokes / Recent Jokes

How do you blindfold a Chinese? Dental floss!

About this time last year, I was sitting in my dentist's office waiting to have a root canal done, when I noticed a flyer (advertisement) for a "personal dental drill". After some interesting images went through my head, I asked the receptionist if they really sold these things and she said yes.
Well, it was three days before Christmas and I hadn't gotten the secretary in the office (Vivian) a present yet, so I bought one.
When I got home, I realized that there was no literature in the little package - no warranty card, no instruction, no nothing - so I wrote some. Below is the promotional flyer that came with Vivian's.
Thank you for purchasing the "digger" personal dental drill from ACME Corp., makers of do it yourself dental devices since 1939.
We hope you will get years of satisfaction from your new drill. The enclosed instruction manual provides step by step instructions for performing a variety of dental procedures from simple cavaties to root more...

> DENTAL WORK
> ----------------------
>
> A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement
> that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he
> suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth.
> Turning to the man next to him, he said, "I forgot my teeth."
>
> The man said, "No problem."
>
> With that, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair
> of false teeth. "Try these," he said.
>
> The speaker tried them. "Too loose," he said.
>
> The man then said, "I have another pair... try these."
>
> The speaker tried them and responded, "Too tight."
>
> The man was not taken back at all. He then said, "I have
> one more pair of false teeth... try them."
>
> The speaker said, "They fit perfectly."
>
> With that he ate his meal and gave his address. After more...

Why did the guru refuse Novocaine when he went to his dentist?

He wanted to transcend dental medication.

***************

Then there's the woman who goes to the dentist. As he leans over to begin working on her, she grabs his crotch.

The dentist says, "Madam, I believe you've got a hold of my privates."

The woman replies, "Yes. Now, we're going to be careful not to hurt each other, aren't we."

****************

A friend of mine went to the dentist recently. He commented that it must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone's mouth. He said, "I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet."

About this time last year, I was sitting in my dentist's office waiting to have a root canal done, when I noticed a flyer (advertisement) for a "personal dental drill". After some interesting images went through my head, I asked the receptionist if they really sold these things and she said yes.
Well, it was three days before Christmas and I hadn't gotten the secretary in the office (Vivian) a present yet, so I bought one.
When I got home, I realized that there was no literature in the little package - no warranty card, no instruction, no nothing - so I wrote some. Below is the promotional flyer that came with Vivian's.

Thank you for purchasing the "digger" personal dental drill from ACME Corp., makers of do it yourself dental devices since 1939.
We hope you will get years of satisfaction from your new drill. The enclosed instruction manual provides step by step instructions for performing a variety of dental procedures from simple more...