Young Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
    young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
    At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin...g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
    Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
    The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: "You deserved it, you horny bastard!"
    And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land."

    A lawyer, a doctor, a little boy and a priest were all out on a small plane for an afternoon flight when the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the pilot's best efforts, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot yelled out to his passengers that they'd better jump, grabbed a parachute and bailed out.
    Unfortunately, that left only three remaining parachutes. Grabbing one, the doctor said, "I am a doctor and I save lives, so I must live," and he jumped.
    The lawyer then grabbed a parachute and said, "I am the smartest man in the world. I definitely deserve to live." Then he jumped.
    Looking at the young boy, the priest said, "Son, I have been fortunate to have lived a long and full life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Take the last parachute and live in peace."
    Handing the parachute back to the priest, the little boy said, "Don't worry, Father. The smartest man in the world just jumped out with my more...

    A young woman goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies.
    A couple of days later, another young woman comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue "Y" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies.
    A couple of days later, another young woman comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green "M" on her chest. "Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?" asks the doctor.
    "No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you more...

    A young Marine and his commanding officer climbed on board a train headed through the mountains of Switzerland. The only place they could find to sit was right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother.

    After a while, it became obvious that the young woman and the young soldier were interested in each other, but the young woman kept glancing nervously at her grandmother.

    Soon the train passed into a pitch black tunnel. There was the sound of a passionate kiss followed by the sound of a stinging slap. When the train emerged from the tunnel, the four sat there without saying a word.

    The grandmother thought to herself: "It was very brash for that young soldier to kiss my granddaughter, and I'm glad she slapped him."

    The commanding officer sat there thinking: "I figured he'd try to steal a kiss, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped and hit me!"

    The young woman was sitting and more...

    Once there was a farmer who sired four daughters. After they reached
    puberty, he fretted for their virtue and always answered the door with a
    loaded shotgun in his hands.
    One night he answered a knock at the door to find a young man standing at
    his threshold. The young man said:
    "My name is Freddie
    I've come to pick up Betty.
    We're going out for spaghetti.
    I hope she's ready."
    The farmer thought the lad's introduction intelligent and witty, so he let
    his daughter go out with the fellow.
    A few minutes later, another knock was heard. Upon answering, the farmer
    encountered a second youth who said:
    "My name's Vance.
    I've come for Nance.
    We're going to a dance.
    Is she ready by chance?"
    Again the farmer though the introduction and the young lad to be
    acceptible, so he allowed his second daughter to go out.
    Within a short time, a third knock was heard and yet another young man
    was standing on more...

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