"Church rules..." joke

Hot 1 year ago

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church.

The pastor said,' We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.'

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.

The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked,' Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?' The old man replied,' No problem at all, Pastor.'

'Congratulations! Welcome to the church!' said the pastor.

The pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked,' Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?' The man replied,' The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes we made it.'

'Congratulations! Welcome to the church!' said the pastor.

The pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked,' Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?'

'No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks,' the young man replied sadly.

'What Happened?' inquired the pastor.

'My wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there.'

'You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church,' stated the pastor.

'We know.' said the young man,' We're not welcome at the grocery store anymore either.'

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur's youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to more...

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's, one of the largest department store chains. He shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said.' I'd like to buy a bra for my wife'

'What type of bra?' asked the clerk.

'Type?' inquires the man' more...

A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.' What's up?' he says.

'I'm having a heart attack,' cries the woman.

He rushes downstairs to grab more...

There once was a good Baptist Minister, who in order to make his family's budget go a little further, rode a bicycle to Church and to Church functions. One day his bike turned up missing. He searched everywhere, but could not find it. Since it was a very small town he lived in, more...

An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...

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Donna Layne:okay...what is the point???? If you don't do what you've been told not to do or if you do do what you have been told not to do you still get punished???? And that is funny??? That is a sweet subject to discuss..... but anyway, please tell me the humor of the joke. I am lost. : )
Funny Joke? 18 vote(s). 89% are positive. 1 comment(s).