Television Jokes / Recent Jokes

American Idol alumni offer advice to thousands of hopefuls.
"Be yourself," advised Carrie Underwood, "and don't sleep with the camera man, he has herpes."

Television is more interesting than people. If it were not, we would have people standing in our living rooms.

Hit Television Shows in Iraq:

"Husseinfeld" "Mad About Everything" "U. S. Military Secrets Revealed" "Suddenly Sanctions" "Allah McBeal" "Children Are Forbidden From Saying Anything Darndest" "Matima Loves Chachi" "The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show" "Buffy The Slayer of Yankee Imperialist Dogs" "Wheel of Fortune and Terror" "Iraq's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers" "Achmed's Creek" "The Price is Right If Saddam Says It's Right" M*U*S*T*A*S*H "Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses" "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Mosque" "When Kurds Attack" "Just Shoot Me" "My Two Baghdads" "Captured Iranian Soldiers Say the Darndest Things" "Two Guys, a Girl and a Fatwah" "Totally Clothed Baywatch"

One female said Letterman told her to roll over on her back, stick her legs up in the air, and growl. She said Letterman got the idea from a "stupid pet trick."

...British singer Susan Boyle claims she was bullied and beaten as a child. And she still has the ugly stick to prove it.

Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $64,000 Question. The night before the big question, he told the M.C. that he desired a question on American History.

The big night had arrived. Bob made his way on stage in front of the studio and TV audience. He had become the talk of the week. He was the best guest this show had ever seen. The M.C. stepped up to the mike.

"Bob, you have chosen American History as your final question. You know that if you correctly answer this question, you will walk away $64,000 dollars richer. Are you ready?"

Bob nodded with a cocky confidence-the crowd went nuts. He hadn't missed a question all week. "Bob, your question on American History is a two-part question. As you know, you may answer either part first. As a rule, the second half of the question is always easier. Which part would you like to take a stab at first?"

Bob was now becoming more noticeably nervous. He couldn't believe more...

Eliot Spitzer has quickly become the butt of many late-night jokes. He was the focus of The Late Show with David Letterman's Top Ten list, about messages Spitzer has on his answer machine now.