All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for business purposes. For example, if you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U. S.

Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax decision: "Where else are you going to read the paper? Outside? What if it rains?"

A fine is a tax for doing something wrong.

A tax is a fine for doing something right.

Where there's a will, there's an Inheritance Tax.

Tony died and was sent to be judged. He was told that he had cheated on his income taxes, and that the only way he could get into heaven would be to sleep with a stupid, butt-ugly woman for the next five years and enjoy it. Tony decided that this was a small price to pay for an eternity in heaven. So off he went with this woman, pretending to be happy.

As he was walking along, he saw his friend Carlos up ahead. Carlos was with an even uglier woman than he was with. When he approached Carlos he asked him what was going on, and Carlos replied "I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot of money." They both shook their heads in understanding and figured that as long as they have to be with these women, they might as well hang out together to help pass the time.

Now Tony, Carlos, and their two beastly women were walking along, minding their own business when Tony and Carlos saw their friend Jon up ahead, with an absolutely drop more...

The government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.

How many tax advisors does it take to change a light bulb?

"In the summer there is a tax deductible convention in Hawaii, dealing exactly with this issue."