Signing Jokes

There was this store that had three baths, a guy comes in and say's "can I use your bathroom?"

The guy who works at the store say's "ok there is three, a wooden one a metal one and a signing one."

The man say's "o.k. I'll go in the wooden one." Later on a nother guy comes in and say's "can I use your bathroom?" The clerk say's "There is a metal one and a signing one." The man say's "I'll go in the medal one." Later on another guy comes in and say's "can I use your bathroom?" The clerk say's "there is a singing one." The man goesae in it. After a long time, the first man comes out and say's "I don't like that one, I got slivers up my butt." The second one comes out and say's "I don't like that one because my butt got stuck." Then the last guy came out and said "I don't like that one because It sang "Do you see what I see?"

When signing a contract, it helps to remember "the big-type gives, and the small-type takes away".

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

On a visit to the library I happened to notice a man and a woman, both deaf, signing with intense gestures, apparently in a heated debate.

The man said something, and the woman seemed upset. She started signing her reply very fast, to the point where the man couldn't understand a word; she also signed in big, wide gestures, which is the equivalent of volume.

Finally, looking strained, her companion took her hands, "silencing" her. The he signed, very small and slowly, "You don't have to shout, I'm not blind."

Major League Baseball nixed a New York Yankees signing after the player turned out to be under 16-years-old. They became suspicious when the player was asked his age, and responded by saying, "this many."