Ping Jokes / Recent Jokes
There were three guys and there was anoyher guy the guy
said I want you to find the biggest ping pong balls, the first
guy came back with a ball no bigger than a tennis ball.
The second guy comes back with a ball no bigger than a
football. The third guy comes back with a ball bigger
than a boulder The guy said were did you get that Oh I got it
from king kong The guy said I said ping pong balls not king
kongs balls
Ping Ping,the world's smallest man,has died.Randy Newman will sing short people got no reason to live, at his funeral,and feel horrible about it.
Losing My Connection
by Alan Zacher
to the tune of Losing My Religion
(Apologies to REM)
Windoze is bigger
It's bigger than Earth
But not quite as big as
The things that I must do now
To upgrade all my stuff
Oh no I need more RAM
I set it up
That's me in the corner
That's me on the help line
Losing my connection
Trying to keep up with Linux
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I need more RAM
I haven't bought enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you Ping!
I think I thought I saw a GPF
Every nightmare
Of velour vest wearing Borg, I'm
Purchasing new hardware
Trying to cool my CPU
Like a Pentium that become a 286
Oh no I need more RAM
Resistance is futile.
Consider this
The OS of the century
Consider this
The OS that brought me
To my knees failed
Now all these open apps have
Come crashing down
Now I need more RAM
I more...
The Top Ten Nerf Toys!
10. The Nerf Sling shot for those whose parent's do not approve of any type of weapon. (Don't shoot at point blank range, it may cause longterm damage to target)
9. The nerf nerve prodder delivers quick shocks to target, three settings nerf, old timer, and die die die.
8. The nberf raygun is a compact gun with two settings don't hurt nothin (nerf) and blow your bedroom walls to oblivian.
7. The nerf exploding football is the perfect tool for teaching your children how to catch a football. (Football if dropped delivers a 50 mega ton nuclear explosion to surrounding area and state)
6. The nerf robotic ping pong opponent is great for the experienced ping pong player, it also teaches advanced techniques. (if the robotic nerf ping pong players opponent misses the ping pong ball during a game, this robot has been known to chuck a large number of balls at his/her head)
5. the nerf electronic Karate tutor is an excelent addition to any dojo, the more...
One day the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday she will ask a question to the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.
On the first Friday the teacher asks: "How many grains of sand are on the beach?" needless to say, no one could answer.
The following Friday, the teacher asks the class: "How many stars are in the sky?" and again no one could answer. Frustrated little Johnny decides that the next Friday he would somehow answer the question and get a 3 day weekend.
So Thursday night Johnny takes 2 ping pong balls and paints them black. The next day he brings them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day just when the teacher says, "here's this week's question," Johnny empties the bag to the floor sending the ping pong balls rolling to the front of the room. Because they are young kids who find any disruption of class amusing, the entire class more...
One day the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday she will ask a question to the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.On the first Friday the teacher asks: "How many grains of sand are on the beach?" needless to say, no one could answer.The following Friday, the teacher asks the class: "How many stars are in the sky?" and again no one could answer. Frustrated little Johnny decides that the next Friday he would somehow answer the question and get a 3 day weekend.So Thursday night Johnny takes 2 ping pong balls and paints them black. The next day he brings them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day just when the teacher says, "here's this week's question," Johnny empties the bag to the floor sending the ping pong balls rolling to the front of the room. Because they are young kids who find any disruption of class amusing, the entire class starts more...
One day the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday she will ask a question to the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday. On the first Friday the teacher asks: "How many grains of sand are on the beach?" needless to say, no one could answer. The following Friday, the teacher asks the class: "How many stars are in the sky?" and again no one could answer. Frustrated little Johnny decides that the next Friday he would somehow answer the question and get a 3 day weekend. So Thursday night Johnny takes 2 ping pong balls and paints them black. The next day he brings them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day just when the teacher says, "here's this week's question," Johnny empties the bag to the floor sending the ping pong balls rolling to the front of the room. Because they are young kids who find any disruption of class amusing, the entire class starts more...