School Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    hairline

    Hot 5 months agoby ryt

    your hairline so far back i thought u went bald in 3rd grade

    Dirty Words

    Hot 5 months ago

    One day, little Timmy was at school and heard the word "shit". He went home and asked his dad for the definition and he promptly told him "coats and jackets".
    Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word "fucking", and for a second time, asked his father what it meant. His father promptly said "cooking".
    Then, he returned to school the third day and heard the words "bitches and hoes". He went home and his father told him it meant "grandpa and grandma".
    Later, on Thanksgiving night, his grandparents came over.
    Timmy answered the door with glee and says...
    "Hey bitches and hoes! I'll take your shit to the closet cause dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey!

    Lipstick at School

    Hot 4 months ago

    According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.
    That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
    Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
    To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip more...

    Physics Exam

    Hot 2 months ago

    Story of a Physics student who got the following question in an exam:

    "You are given an accurate barometer, how would you use it to determine the height of a skyscraper? "

    He answered: "Go to the top floor, tie a long piece of string to the barometer, let it down' till it touches the ground and measure the length of the string".

    The examiner wasn't satisfied, so they decided to interview the guy:

    "Can you give us another method, one which demonstrates your knowledge of Physics? "

    "Sure, go to the top floor, drop the barometer off, and measure how long before it hits the ground......"

    "Not, quite what we wanted, care to try again? "

    "Make a pendulum of the barometer, measure its period at the bottom, then measure its period at the top......"

    "..another try? ...."

    "Measure the length of the barometer, then mount it more...

    Kentucky Kid

    Hot 2 months ago

    A kid, just getting home from school runs up to his dad...
    "Daddy, daddy! I'm the only one in my class that can count to ten. Why do you rec'un so?"
    "Why that's because your from Kentucky son." The dad responses.
    The next day the kid gets home from school...
    "Daddy, daddy! I'm the only one in my class that knows all the letters in the alphabet. Why do you rec'un so?"
    "That's because you're from Kentucky son." The dad tells him again.
    The next day the kid busts through the door...
    "Daddy. daddy! I'm the only one in school who has a large penis, is that because I'm from Kentucky?"
    The dad looks at him and says, "No that's because you're 22."

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