Jenny Jokes / Recent Jokes

Little four-year-old Jenny was looking at her new baby brother for the first time. He was fast asleep.
After staring at her tiny, motionless baby brother for a few minutes, Jenny looked up at her mother and asked plaintively, "Didn't he come with batteries?"

Chocolate maker Nestle announced Monday that it will purchase weight loss product maker Jenny Craig Inc. for $600 million.

The large investment is an attempt to further Nestle’s health and wellness programs, as well as the latest chess move in a continuing effort by big business to ensure that Jenny Craig spokeswoman Kirstie Alley remains fat.

Q: Why can't lesbians be on a diet and wear make-up at the same time?
A: They can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on their face.

My Dear Husband,

I am sending you this letter via this BBS communications thing, so that you will be sure to read it. Please forgive the deception, but I thought you should know what has been going on at home since your computer entered our lives TWO YEARS AGO. The children are doing well. Tommy is seven now and is a bright, handsome boy. He has developed quite an interest in the arts. He drew a family portrait for a school project, all the figures were good, and the back of your head is very realistic. You should be very proud of him.

Little Jennifer turned three in September. She looks a lot like you did at that age. She is an attractive child and quite smart. She still remembers that you spent the whole afternoon with us on her birthday. What a grand day for Jenny, despite the fact that it was stormy and the electricity was out.

I am doing well. I went blonde about a year ago, and discovered that it really is more fun! George, I mean, Mr. Wilson, more...

Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one daycomplaining about Nurse Jenny. "She's incrediblydumb. She does everything absolutely backwards." said one doctor. "Just last week, I told her togive a patient 2 milligrams of percocet every 10hours. She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He nearly died on us!" The second doctor said,"That's nothing. Earlier this week, I told her togive a patient an enema every 24 hours. She triedto give him 24 enemas in one hour! The guy nearlyexploded!"Suddenly, they hear this blood-curdling scream fromdown the hall. "Oh my God!" said the first doctor, "I just realized I told Nurse Jenny to prickMr. Smith's boil!"