Jenny Jokes

Little four-year-old Jenny was looking at her new baby brother for the first time. He was fast asleep.
After staring at her tiny, motionless baby brother for a few minutes, Jenny looked up at her mother and asked plaintively, "Didn't he come with batteries?"

Chocolate maker Nestle announced Monday that it will purchase weight loss product maker Jenny Craig Inc. for $600 million.

The large investment is an attempt to further Nestle’s health and wellness programs, as well as the latest chess move in a continuing effort by big business to ensure that Jenny Craig spokeswoman Kirstie Alley remains fat.

Jenny's husband, Jeremy, was a male chauvinist. Even though they both worked full-time, he never helped around the house. Housework was woman's work!

But one evening Jenny arrived home from work to find the children bathed, one load of clothes in the washer and another in the dryer, dinner on the stove, and the table set.

She was astonished -- something's up. It turns out that Jeremy had read an article that said wives who worked full-time and had to do their own housework were too tired to have sex.

The night went well and the next day she told her office friends all about it. "We had a great dinner. Jeremy even cleaned up. He helped the kids do their homework, folded all the laundry and put everything away. I really enjoyed the evening."

"But what about afterward?" asked her friends.

"Oh, that was perfect! too. Jeremy was too tired!" she replied.

Q: Why can't lesbians be on a diet and wear make-up at the same time?
A: They can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on their face.

your mommas so fat when she went to jenny craigs the only thing stopping her was the front door