Cause Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    CinderBlock

    Hot 1 year ago

    There's a man with three daughters.
    The first daughter(a Brunette) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Daisy" the dad says" 'cause when you were born a daisy fell on your head."
    The second daughter (a red-head) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Rose" the dad says "'cause when you were born a rose fell on your head."
    The third daughter (a blonde) comes up and says "kjaglifvgjlfj" the dad says "SHUTUP CINDERBLOCK"

    Bill Gates compares the computer industry with General Motors
    At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
    In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating (by Mr. Welch himself):
    If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
    For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
    Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
    Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
    Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall more...

    Indian Pop Hits

    Hot 4 years ago

    The Indian Top 10:
    1. Tears on My Pillau.
    2. Its my chappalti and I'll cry if I want to.
    3. Tikka Chance on Me.
    4. Scatnaan.
    5. Korma Korma Chameleon.
    6. What's the Story Morning Tandoori.
    7. Easy like Sanjay Morning.
    8. You Can't Curry Love.
    9. Poppadum Preach.
    10. Sheikh Your Body. All available on the fantastic new album, Turban Hymns by Donner Summer.
    Bohemian Curry (sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen)
    Naan-aa, just killed a man
    Poppadom against his head
    Had lime pickle, now he's dead.
    Naan-aa, dinner just begun
    But now I'm going to crap it all away.
    Naan-aa,
    ooh-ooh
    Didn't mean to make you cry,
    Seen nothin' yet just see the loo tomorrow,
    Curry on, Curry on,
    'cause nothing really madras.
    Too late, my dinner's gone
    Sends shivers up my spine
    Rectum aching all the time.
    Goodbye every bhaji, I've got to go
    Gotta leave you all behind and use the more...

    I can't find a cause for your illness, the doctor said. "Frankly, I think it's due to drinking.""In that case," replied his blonde patient, "I'll come back when you are sober."

    MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET Workplace Hazardous Materials Information
    System
    Substance: Woman Manufacturer: God Typical Size: Average weight 115
    lbs.; specimens can vary from 90 to over 200 lbs. Occurrence: Large
    quantities found in urban areas and shopping malls.
    PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
    1. Surface Tension-soft and warm.
    2. Exposed surfaces usually cosmetically enhanced.
    3. Boils at nothing.
    4. Freezes without reason.
    5. Melts with special reason.
    6. Flavor initially sweet, becomes bitter if used incorrectly.
    7. Found in various states of purity from virgin metal to common
    ore.
    8. Yields to pressure applied to specific points.
    9. Sometimes enlarges alarmingly with age.
    10. Even brief linking with male substance can cause substance to
    reproduce with marked physical and mental changes.
    CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
    1. Has affinity for gold, silver, and precious stones.
    2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive more...

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