Cause Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    CinderBlock

    Hot 11 months ago

    There's a man with three daughters.
    The first daughter(a Brunette) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Daisy" the dad says" 'cause when you were born a daisy fell on your head."
    The second daughter (a red-head) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Rose" the dad says "'cause when you were born a rose fell on your head."
    The third daughter (a blonde) comes up and says "kjaglifvgjlfj" the dad says "SHUTUP CINDERBLOCK"

    Bill Gates compares the

    Hot 10 months ago

    Bill Gates compares the computer industry with General Motors
    At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
    In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating (by Mr. Welch himself):
    If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
    For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
    Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
    Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
    Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall more...

    I can't find a cause for your illness, the doctor said. "Frankly, I think it's due to drinking.""In that case," replied his blonde patient, "I'll come back when you are sober."

    MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET Workplace Hazardous Materials Information
    System
    Substance: Woman Manufacturer: God Typical Size: Average weight 115
    lbs.; specimens can vary from 90 to over 200 lbs. Occurrence: Large
    quantities found in urban areas and shopping malls.
    PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
    1. Surface Tension-soft and warm.
    2. Exposed surfaces usually cosmetically enhanced.
    3. Boils at nothing.
    4. Freezes without reason.
    5. Melts with special reason.
    6. Flavor initially sweet, becomes bitter if used incorrectly.
    7. Found in various states of purity from virgin metal to common
    ore.
    8. Yields to pressure applied to specific points.
    9. Sometimes enlarges alarmingly with age.
    10. Even brief linking with male substance can cause substance to
    reproduce with marked physical and mental changes.
    CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
    1. Has affinity for gold, silver, and precious stones.
    2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive more...

    Blind man!

    Hot 3 years ago

    so there were 3 young nuns named jasmine who was 29 nicole who was 28 and jessica who was 22 in a small church painting the inside cause it had not even opened yet and it was so hot so nicole all of a sudden just took her cloethes off and said hey were all women here so then jasmine and jessica took there cloethes off too.then they heard a knock on the door they said who is it? blind man, he answered so they thought oh well thats ok cause you know he cant see so jasmine said just 1 minute and she went to the door and said welcome and hes like yeah ok nice boobs and which window does these blinds go on??

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