Grill Jokes / Recent Jokes

A couple had been married 15 years. One afternoon they were working in the garden together. As the wife was bending over pulling weeds, the husband said,' 'Hey, honey, you're getting fat. Your butt is getting huge. I bet it's as big as the gas grill now.''

The husband, feeling he needed to prove his point, got a yardstick, measured the grill, and then measured his wife's butt.' 'Yes,'' he said,' 'just what I thought, just about the same size.'' The wife got very incensed and decided to let him do the gardening alone. She went inside and didn't speak to her husband the rest of the day.

That evening, when they went to bed, the husband cuddled up to his wife, and said,' 'How about it, honey? How about a little action?'' the wife rolled over and turned her back to him, giving him the cold shoulder.

' 'What's the matter?'' he asked

To which she replied,' 'You don't think I'm going to fire up this big gas grill for one little weenie, do you?''

Barbeque is the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man volunteers
to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion.
The woman goes to the store.
The woman "fixes" the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with
the necessary cooking utensils, and takes it to the man, who is lounging
beside the grill.
The man places the meat on the grill.
The woman goes inside to set the table and check the vegetables.
The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.
The man takes the meat off the grill and hands it to the woman.
The woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table.
After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon
seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some
women.

A couple had been married 10 years.

One afternoon, they were working in the garden together.

As the wife was bending over pulling weeds, the husband said..."Hey honey, you're getting fat. Your butt is huge. I'll bet it's as wide as the gas grill."

Feeling the need to prove his point, he got out a yard stick and measured the grill, then his wife's butt.

"Yep," he said, "just what I thought, just about the same size."

The wife became mad and left him gardening alone. She went inside the house and didn't speak to him for the rest of the day.

When they retired to bed that evening, the husband cuddled up to his wife and said, "How about it, honey? How about a little lovemaking?"

The wife turned her back to him, giving him the cold shoulder.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

She replied, "You don't think I'm going to fire up this big ass more...

So this couple had been married for about five years, and one fine summer day as they're out working in the yard, the man tells his wife, "Man, you're butt is getting fat."
She gets ticked off and moves to another part of the yard. The guy follows her and says, "You know that big gas grill over there. I'll bet your butt is as big as that grill. It's huge!"
The wife gets really mad, tells him HE can finish the yard HIMSELF and she goes inside. Then the husband finds a yardstick, measures the grill, goes inside and measures his wife and says, "Yup. They are both the same size."
The wife is livid! She doesn't speak to him the rest of the day. When the man comes to bed that night, he tries to cuddle up next to his wife and says, "Hey, honey, how' bout it?" She thinks for a moment and pulls away.
"What's wrong?" he asks. She answers, "You're crazy, if you think I'm firing up that big gas grill for one little more...

Long, but really funny... from a Company in USA. DATE: October 01, 2003RE: Christmas Party I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1: 00pm. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10. 00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees! Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time! Merry Christmas to you and your family. Patty =============================================================== FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: October 02, 2003 RE: Holiday Party In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our more...

Barbeque--it's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man
volunteers to do the' BBQ' the following chain of events are usually put
into motion.
1) The woman goes to the store.
2) The woman fixes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with
the necessary cooking utensils, and takes it to the man, who is lounging
beside the grill, drink in hand.
4) The man places the meat on the grill.
5) The woman goes inside to set the table and checks the vegetables.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.
7) The man takes the meat off the grill and hands it to the woman.
8) The woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
10) Everyone praises man and thanks him for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed' her more...

Alan and his wife, Debbie, are working in the garden. Debbie bends over to rip up weeds.' Wow, Debbie,' Alan says.' Your butt is getting really wide.'' No, it's not!' Debbie says. Debbie walks towards the barbecue grill to throw the weeds in a trash can.' Your butt is getting so big that it's almost wider than the grill!' Alan says. He gets a tape measure and measures Debbie and the grill.' Ha,' Alan says.' Your butt's the same exact size as the grill!' Debbie ignores Alan's comments and refuses to speak to him for three days. On the fourth night, they're lying in bed watching television.' I could sure use some lovin',' Alan says. Debbie looks over at him and yells,' Don't think for one minute that I'm going to fire up this big grill for one little weenie!'