Factory Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Latex Factory

    Hot 7 months ago

    A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products.

    At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."

    Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss. Hiss-pop" noise. "Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?" "Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. It pokes a hole in every fourth condom." "Well, that can't be good for the condoms!" "Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"

    South Dakota Dumb Laws

    Hot 5 months ago

    - It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
    - Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
    - If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
    - Spearfish: If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.

    Gum Chewing

    Hot 2 years ago

    A gum-chewing American and a Frenchman are sitting together in a restaurant. The American feel really proud to be an American, so he starts a conversation.
    He asks the Frenchman, "When you eat bread, do you eat all of it?"
    "Mais oui!, of course!" responds the Frenchman.
    "Well," says the American, "we only eat the soft part of it. The rest we collect in containers, take to a factory and put through a mill. What comes out are little breads that we sell in France.
    "And what about steaks?" he continues. "Do you eat all parts of them?"
    "Bien sur! We do," replies the Frenchman.
    "You don`t say!" says the America, grinning. "We don`t! We only eat the meaty part of the steak. The greasy part we collect in containers, take to a factory, put through a mill, and what comes out are little steaks that we sell in France."
    Now the Frenchman is really riled. So he asks, "And more...

    The light bulb

    Hot 1 year ago

    A factory foreman is walking through the work area, and notices that Kawolski isn't at his station.
    He asks one of the other workers if they know where Kawolski is, and the employee points straight up in the air. The foreman looks up, and there's Kawolski, hanging by one arm from the rafters.
    "Get down from there, Kawolski," he yells, to which Kawolski replies, "But I'm a light bulb!"
    The boss is -NOT- impressed, and makes Kawolski climb down and get back to work.
    About an hour later, the boss is walking through the factory once again, and once again he notices that Kawolski is missing. On a hunch, he looks up, and again sees Kawolski hanging by one arm from the rafters.
    The foreman makes him climb down, and chews him out, saying that if he catches Kawolski up there one more time, he's going to get fired.
    Another hour later, the boss is making another round, and sure enough... there's Kawolski, hanging by one arm from the more...

    Tickle Me Elmo

    Hot 1 year ago

    There is a factory in America which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arm. A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00am.

    The next day at 8:45am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The foreman from the assembly line throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

    The personnel manager decides he should see this for himself so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there, the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.

    At the end of the line stands the new employee surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement more...

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