Description Jokes / Recent Jokes

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve
to begin the process of populating the Earth so I want you to kiss her."
Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a 'kiss'?" So the Lord gave a brief
description to Adam, who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush.
A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was
enjoyable."
And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like
you to caress Eve."
And Adam said, "What is a 'caress'?" So the Lord again gave Adam a brief
description, and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.
Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "Lord, that was
even better than the kiss."
And the Lord said, "You've done well, Adam. And now I want you to make love to
Eve."
And Adam asked, "What is 'make love', Lord?" So the Lord more...

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her."
Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a kiss?"
So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush. A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was enjoyable."
And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like you to caress Eve."
Adam said, "What is a caress?"
So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve. Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "Lord, that was even better than the kiss."
And the Lord said, "'You've done well Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve."
Adam asked, "What is 'make love' Lord?"
So the Lord again gave Adam directions and Adam went more...

A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony trial -- it went like this:
Q: Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
A: No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender running several blocks away.
Q: Officer, who provided this description?
A: The officer who responded to the scene.
Q: A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?
A: Yes sir, with my life.
Q: With your life? Let me ask you this then officer, do you have a locker room in the police station, a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?
A: Yes sir, we do.
Q: And do you have a locker in that room?
A: Yes sir, I do.
Q: And do you have a lock on your locker?
A: Yes sir.
Q: Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room more...

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the Earth so I want you to kiss her."
Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a 'kiss'?" So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam, who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush.
A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was enjoyable."
And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like you to caress Eve."
And Adam said, "What is a 'caress'?" So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description, and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.
Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "Lord, that was even better than the kiss."
And the Lord said, "You've done well, Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve."
And Adam asked, "What is 'make love', Lord?" So the Lord again gave Adam directions, and more...

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her." Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a 'kiss?' " So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush. A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was enjoyable." And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like you to caress Eve." And Adam said, "What is a 'caress?'" So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve. Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "Lord, that was even better than the kiss." And the Lord said, "You've done well Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve." And Adam asked, "What is 'make love' Lord?'" So the Lord again gave Adam directions and Adam went again to Eve behind more...

A lady called the police to report that her husband was missing.
The police arrived and asked for a description of her husband. She told them that he was 6 foot 2 inches tall with blonde wavy hair and a smile that made everyone love him.
The police proceeded to go next door to ask the neighbor if she had any information about the man. The lady next door, astonished at the description given to the police by her neighbor, told the police, "That's not true. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, is bald and has a perpetual frown on his face."
After the police left, the neighbor went to ask why the woman had given the police a false description of her husband.
She replied, "Just because I reported him missing doesn't mean I want him back!"

One day, an old Italian couple arrived in New York City. This was the first time out of their native town, and it wasn't long before the wife got lost. The Italian husband asked a passerby for help and was told to go to the police and report it.
When he got there, a police officer asked for his wife's description.
"What's that?" asked the Italian.
"Well, you see, a 'description' is telling what something looks like. For example, my wife is 25-years-old, 5'11", weighs 140 pounds, and measures 38-25-36. Now, what can you tell me about your wife?"
"Forget her!" exclaimed the Italian. "Let's go look for yours!"