Checkbook Jokes / Recent Jokes

I just wanted to let you know that I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD - Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it goes...
I decide to do the laundry, start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. OK, I'm going to do the laundry...
BUT FIRST I'm going to read the newspaper. After that, I notice the mail on the table. OK, I'll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack...
BUT FIRST I'll look through the pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be paid. Yes. Now where is the checkbook? Oops... there's the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I'm going to look for that checkbook...
BUT FIRST I need to put the glass in the sink. I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water, I put the glass in the sink and there's the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What's it doing here? I'll just put it away...
BUT FIRST I need to water those plants. I head for the door more...

His And Hers ATMsHIS: 1. Pull up to ATM 2. Insert card 3. Enter PIN number and account 4. Take cash, card and receipt HER: 1. Pull up to ATM 2. Check makeup in rearview mirror 3. Shut off engine 4. Put keys in purse 5. Get out of car because you're too far from machine 6. Hunt for card in purse 7. Insert card 8. Hunt in purse for tampon wrapper with PIN number written on it. 9. Enter PIN number 10. Study instructions for at least 2 minutes. 11. Hit "cancel" 12. Re-enter correct PIN number 13. Check balance 14. Look for envelope 15. Look in purse for pen 16. Make out deposit slip 17. Endorse checks 18. Make deposit 19. Study instructions 20. Make cash withdrawal 21. Get in car 22. Check makeup 23. Look for keys 24. Start car 25. Check makeup 26. Start pulling away 27. STOP 28. Back up to machine 29. Get out of car 30. Take card and receipt 31. Get back in car 32. Put card in wallet 33. Put receipt in checkbook 34. Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook 35. Clear area in more...