Borg Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Picard "Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command pathways?"Geordi "Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer by searching through our archives on late Twentieth-century computing technology."Geordi presses a key, and a logo appears on the computer screen. Riker looks puzzled. "What in the world is' Microsoft'?"Data turns to answer. "Allow me to explain. We will send this program, for some reason called' Windows', through the Borg command pathways. Once inside their root command unit, it will begin consuming system resources at an unstoppable rate."Picard "But the Borg have the ability to adapt. Won't they alter their processing systems to increase their storage capacity?"Data "Yes, Captain. But when' Windows' detects this, it creates a new version of itself known as an' upgrade'. The use of resources increases exponentially more...

    -==( Forwards beamed into deep space )==-
    "Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command pathways?"
    "Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer by searching through our archives on late Twentieth-century computing technology." (Geordi presses a key, and a logo appears on the computer screen.)
    (Riker looks puzzled.) "What the hell is 'Microsoft'?"
    (Data turns to answer.) "Allow me to explain. We will send this program, for some reason called 'Windows', through the Borg command pathways. Once inside their root command unit, it will begin consuming system resources at an unstoppable rate."
    "But the Borg have the ability to adapt. Won't they alter their processing systems to increase their storage capacity?"
    "Yes, Captain. But when 'Windows' detects this, it creates a new version of itself known as an more...

    Knock KnockWhos there! Borg! Borg who? Borg standard!

    (Your jokes are too funny. You will be assimilated. Your piece de resistance is useless.)
    Two Borg walk into a bar. One Borg says to the other, "Did you hear about that city that was burned down in Argentina?"
    The other Borg replies, "Yeah, just goes to show you; Resistencia is fusil."
    A Borg was walking down a country road when he saw a donkey in a field nearby. Climbing over the fence, he pulled out his hand weapon, prayed loudly, and disintegrated the creature.
    The farmer who lived there ran out the door. "What in the world was that?"
    "Why," said the Borg, "What else? Ass immolation."
    Best Bumpersticker on Borg ship: "Blonde Borgs have the same fun."
    Happy Borg: &>
    Sad Borg: &

    (Your jokes are too funny. You will be assimilated. Your piece de resistance is useless.)
    Two Borg walk into a bar. One Borg says to the other, "Did you hear about that city that was burned down in Argentina?"
    The other Borg replies, "Yeah, just goes to show you; Resistencia is fusil."
    A Borg was walking down a country road when he saw a donkey in a field nearby. Climbing over the fence, he pulled out his hand weapon, prayed loudly, and disintegrated the creature.
    The farmer who lived there ran out the door. "What in the world was that?"
    "Why," said the Borg, "What else? Ass immolation."
    Best Bumpersticker on Borg ship: "Blonde Borgs have the same fun."
    Happy Borg: &>
    Sad Borg: &<
    Locutus: ;|
    Drunk or Stoned Borg: #)
    Borg on Acid: @)
    McBorg - Over Half a billion assimilated.
    Borger King - you will have it _our_ way. Special orders are irrevelant.
    FROM more...

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