April Jokes / Recent Jokes

Study Finds Sex, Pregnancy Link Cornell Daily Sun, December 7, 1995
Whatever Their motives, Moms Who Kill Kids still Shock Us Holland Sentinal, date unknown.
Survey Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut The New York Times, November 22
Larger Kangaroos Leap Farther, Researchers Find The Los Angeles Times, November 2
' Light' meals are lower in fat, calories Huntington Herald-Dispatch, November 30
Alcohol ads promote drinking The Hartford Courant, November 18
Malls try to attract shoppers The Baltimore Sun, October 22
Official: Only rain will cure drought The Herald-News, Westpost, Massachusetts
Teen-age girls often have babies fathered by men The Sunday Oregonian, September 24
Low Wages Said Key to Poverty Newsday, July 11
Man shoots neighbor with machete The Miami Herald, July 3
Tomatoes come in big, little, medium sizes The Daily Progress, Charlottesville, Virginia, March 30
Dirty-Air Cities Far Deadlier Than more...

1991 - A Montana State University chemistry professor claimed in March that he was wrongfully accused of being drunk after an accident (which occurred while he was on work-release for a previous (drunk driving sentence). While a state trooper found him "highly intoxicated," the professor said a chemical explosion in his lab caused him to smell and act drunk and that his statement to the trooper about having consumed a six-pack of beer was merely incoherent babbling" because of the trauma of the accident.
1992 - Steven L. Johnson, 40, sentenced to two years in prison in Brookings, S.D., in April for drunk driving, explained to the judge: "I enjoyed drinking while driving. It's one of the most pleasurable habits I've had."
1993 - Only days apart, two Wisconsin men arrived in court drunk for their trials on drunken-driving charges. Both denied they had been drunk while driving, and both denied they were drunk in the courtroom. James Heard had a 0.26 more...

Koi apki tarif kare aapko Smart kahe to use zor se 1 THAPPAD marna Uski Himmat kaise hui apko APRIL FOOL banana ki or vo b February Mein.

Knock Knock
Who's there!
April!
April who?
April might make you feel better!

1991 -- A Montana State University chemistry professor claimed in March that he was wrongfully accused of being drunk after an accident (which occurred while he was on work-release for a previous (drunk driving sentence). While a state trooper found him "highly intoxicated," the professor said a chemical explosion in his lab caused him to smell and act drunk and that his statement to the trooper about having consumed a six-pack of beer was merely incoherent babbling" because of the trauma of the accident.

1992 -- Steven L. Johnson, 40, sentenced to two years in prison in Brookings, S. D., in April for drunk driving, explained to the judge: "I enjoyed drinking while driving. It's one of the most pleasurable habits I've had."

1993 -- Only days apart, two Wisconsin men arrived in court drunk for their trials on drunken-driving charges. Both denied they had been drunk while driving, and both denied they were drunk in the courtroom. James more...

Study Finds Sex, Pregnancy Link -Cornell Daily Sun, December 7, 1995

Whatever Their motives, Moms Who Kill Kids still Shock Us -Holland Sentinal, date unknown.

Survey Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut -The New York Times, November 22

Larger Kangaroos Leap Farther, Researchers Find -The Los Angeles Times, November 2

"Light" meals are lower in fat, calories -Huntington Herald-Dispatch, November 30

Alcohol ads promote drinking -The Hartford Courant, November 18

Malls try to attract shoppers -The Baltimore Sun, October 22

Official: Only rain will cure drought -The Herald-News, Westpost, Massachusetts

Teen-age girls often have babies fathered by men -The Sunday Oregonian, September 24

Low Wages Said Key to Poverty -Newsday, July 11

Man shoots neighbor with machete -The Miami Herald, July 3

Tomatoes come in big, little, medium sizes -The Daily more...

A Jordanianmayor is suing a newspaperover an April Fools' Day report saying aliens were nearby. He almostevacuated the town's 13,000 frightened residents. I totally disagreewith the mayor. He should tell his people to act likeAmericans - you don't see us overreacting just because a few millionillegal aliens arrive each year.