Appointment Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Quick Husband

    Hot 2 years ago

    The scene - Husband and wife in bed.
    The story - Husband rolls over to wife and taps her in the shoulder.
    Wife says "Not tonight sweetheart I have a gynecologist appointment in the morning".
    Five minutes elapses - Husband rolls over again and taps wife on the shoulder and says "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?"

    True love

    Hot 2 years ago

    It was a busy morning, approximately 8: 30 a. m., when an elderly gentleman in his 80's, arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9: 00 am.
    I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him look at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.
    On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
    While taking care of his wound, we began to engage in conversation. I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.
    I then inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer' s Disease.
    As we more...

    The Wash Cloth

    Hot 7 years ago

    (There is not a woman alive today who won't crack up over this!)I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the
    week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to
    tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am. The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare.As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when
    making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the
    full effort. So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in "that area" to make sure I was at least presentable.I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes,
    hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called
    in. more...

    There are three high school -aged boys walking down the street in Washington,
    D.C. Suddenly, they see Bill Clinton go jogging by, and he is about to be hit by
    a car. So, they pull Bill out of the way and save his life.
    Bill says, "Thank you for saving my life. I will grant each of you one wish."
    The first boy says, "I want to go to Georgetown." Bill pulls some strings and
    gets the boy admitted.
    The second boy says, "I want to get into West Point, but it normally requires a
    Congressional appointment." Bill calls up his Democratic friends in Congress and
    gets the boy his appointment.
    The third boy says, "I want to be buried in Arlington National Cemetery."
    Bill says, "That is an odd request for a 17-year-old!"
    The boy says, "Yes, but when my father finds out I saved your life he is going
    to kill me!"

    Appointment

    Hot 6 years ago

    Banta's wife, Preeto, and kids all came down with the flu. Upon returning home from the pediatrician's office with his four kids, he turned his attention to his ailing wife.
    After preparing some chicken soup for her, he picked up the phone to call her doctor.
    The receptionist picked up and he related the situation to her. She then told him that the office was going to be closed for a couple of days, but that his wife could have an appointment in 3 days.
    Banta went ballistic and yelled into the phone, "Three days?! The doctor can't see her for three days?! She could be dead by then!"
    Calmly the voice at the other end of the line replied, "If so, would you please call to cancel the appointment?"

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