Adult Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Dirty Rubix Riddle

    Hot 2 months ago

    Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
    A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

    Cucumber, Pickle & Penis

    Hot 2 months ago

    One day a cucumber, pickle and a penis were having a conversation.
    The Pickle says, "You know, my life really sucks. Whenever I get big fat and juicy they sprinkle seasonings on my and stick me in a jar.
    The Cucumber says, "Yeah, you think that's bad? Whenever I get big, fat and juicy, they slice me up and put me in a salad.
    The Penis says, "You think that your lives are tough? Whenever I get big, fat and juicy they throw a plastic bag over my head, shove me in a wet, dark, smelly room, and force me to do push-ups until I puke and pass out!

    AIDS or Alzheimer's?

    Hot 2 months ago

    A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
    His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

    The Perfect Penis

    Hot 2 months ago

    A four-year-old boy asked his friend what a penis was. His friend's response was that he did not know and he would ask his dad.

    That evening the second boy asked his dad. His dad gladly exposed himself to his son and with his penis in hand said, "Son this is a penis. In fact, if you take a good look you will see this is a perfect penis."

    The next day the second five year old boy met the first five year old boy and called him behind a hedge.

    The boy exposed himself and said, "This is a penis. In fact, if it were three inches shorter it would be a perfect penis!"

    Women Only Hotel

    Hot 2 months ago

    A group of girlfriends are on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only". Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works.

    "We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside."

    So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: " All the men here have it short and thin." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor.

    The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here have it long and thin." Still, this isn't good enough so the friends continue on up.

    They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here have it short and thick."

    They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are more...

  • Recent Activity