"Cucumber, Pickle & Penis" joke

Hot 2 years ago

One day a cucumber, pickle and a penis were having a conversation.
The Pickle says, "You know, my life really sucks. Whenever I get big fat and juicy they sprinkle seasonings on my and stick me in a jar.
The Cucumber says, "Yeah, you think that's bad? Whenever I get big, fat and juicy, they slice me up and put me in a salad.
The Penis says, "You think that your lives are tough? Whenever I get big, fat and juicy they throw a plastic bag over my head, shove me in a wet, dark, smelly room, and force me to do push-ups until I puke and pass out!

When ever I eat out at McDonald's, I like to have a Happy Meal...

So I leave the wife and kids at home.

I was telling the police officer how local youths had thrown a milk bottle at me and just missed.
He asked, "Skimmed past your face?"
I replied, "No, full fat over my shoulder."

The morning after an all-night honeymoon extravaganza in bed, the newlywed wife snuggles up to her hubby and asks, "Sweetheart, how many others were there before me?
"After a few minutes of silence, the wife says, "Well, I'm waiting."
And the guy more...

Death had a near Chuck Norris experience

The kindergarten class had to come up with a sentence using the colors green, pink, and yellow. So the teacher calls up every single kid in the classroom. But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. So she asks him to please step up to the front of the class and recite his more...

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CHARLIE:IT WAS LONG BUT FUNNY
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Black2J:Your hairline so bad Harriet Tubman went to the back of the bus
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Lona :love it
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young boy:Yo hair look like u got a shape up with a horses back kick.
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Lolcutiepie:Your hairline. Going. To. The. Dumpster to. Shop
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simon:thats lebron james wish lol -_-
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amy:if i was the kid i would want to suck the dads dick and moms pussy
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banana:i love that joke :)
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banana:i love that joke :)
Funny Joke? 268 vote(s). 79% are positive. 9 comment(s).