Alphabet Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Comebacks

    Hot 1 year ago

    Boy: Did it hurt?
    Girl: Did what hurt?
    Boy: When you fell from heaven.
    Girl: Aww, did it hurt when you got kicked out of hell?
    Boy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
    Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put F and U together.

    ABC...

    Hot 1 year ago

    How many letters are in the alphabet?
    There are 11 letters in "THE ALPHABET"
    Did you say 26? :)

    ABC

    Hot 3 years agoby Joey

    There was this boy at school and his teacher said to him " Go home and find the first three letters of the alphabet." So he goes home and asks his sister " What is the first letter of the alphabet?" and she says " Get out of my room you stupid!!!!" And then he goes asks his dad " What is the second letter of the alphabet?" and he yells ( he is watching football) " Forty-six"! And then he goes and asks his mom (who is cooking) " My buns are burning!! My buns are burning"!! And he goes to school the next day and his teacher asks him "What is the first the letter of the alphabet?" and he replys "Get out of my room you stupid"!!!! And he is soon in the princapals office, and the princapal asks him "How many spankings should I give you"? And yells "Forty-six"!! And then he is running down the hall saying " My buns are burning!! My buns are burning"!!

    Get Away From my Deer!

    Hot 6 years ago

    It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, "What are you up to?" Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!" Jake, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along. They arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot." Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant - much less a deer. But not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!" Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. more...

    There are consistent trends in the past evolution of languages, and in
    all likelihood they will continue to change in the same fashion in the
    future.
    In 200 years, spoken French will have only one sound, a vowel. All
    consonants and gaps between words and sentences will disappear, leaving
    only an extended "Eauuuuuuuuuuuu..." Meaning will be inferred from
    facial expression. Written French will stay exactly the same.
    These consonants will not be entirely forgotten; they will migrate
    to Czechoslovakia, which will by that time have no use for vowels.
    In 200 years, the English vocabulary will be the union of all other
    vocabularies, but the spelling will be original.
    Similarly, the Japanese alphabet will be the union of all other
    alphabets in the world.
    The Cyrillic alphabet will eventually be the same as the Latin
    alphabet, only backwards. A mirror will suffice for translating
    Russian into Polish.
    Finally, in 200 more...

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