Confused Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    3 Kinds of Bras

    Hot 1 year ago

    A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's, one of the largest department store chains. He shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said.' I'd like to buy a bra for my wife'

    'What type of bra?' asked the clerk.

    'Type?' inquires the man' There is more than one type?'

    'Look Around,' said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size color and material.

    'Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only three types of bras,' replied the salesclerk.

    Confused, the man asked what were the types.

    The saleslady replied' The Catholic type, the, Salvation Army type, and the Baptist type. Which one do you need?'

    Still confused the man asked' What is the difference between them?'

    The lady responded' It is all really quite simple. The Catholic type supports the masses, the Salvation Army type lifts up the fallen, and the and the Baptist type makes mountains out more...

    A blonde wanted to take up a new hobby so decided to take up ice fishing. She got all of the equipment and set off to start her new hobby. She found a piece of ice and cut a small circular hole in it. On went the maggot on then end of her fishing rod and in went the rod into the water. Minutes later a voice came from above which said "there are no fish under the ice!" Confused she moved futher down the patch of ice that she had found. Once again, she cut a small circular hole in to the ice and in went her rod. Once again a booming voice made her jump. "there are no fish under the ice!" Confused she stuttered "God, God is that you?" "No this is not God, this is the manager of the ice rink!"

    Evaluating progress

    Hot 3 years ago

    A keen analyst: Thoroughly confused.Accepts new job assignments willingly: Never finishes a job.Active socially: Drinks heavily.Alert to company developments: An office gossip.Approaches difficult problems with logic: Finds someone else to do the job.Average: Not too bright.Bridge builder: Likes to compromise.Character above reproach: Still one step ahead of the law.Charismatic: No interest in any opinion but his own.Competent: Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.Conscientious and careful: Scared.Consults with co-workers often: Indecisive, confused, and clueless.Consults with supervisor often: Very annoying.Delegates responsibility effectively: Passes the buck well.Demonstrates qualities of leadership: Has a loud voice.Displays excellent intuitive judgement: Knows when to disappear.Displays great dexterity and agility: Dodges and evades superiors well.Enjoys job: Needs more to do.Excels in sustaining concentration but avoids confrontations: Ignores everyone.Excels in more...

    Get Away From my Deer!

    Hot 6 years ago

    It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, "What are you up to?" Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!" Jake, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along. They arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot." Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant - much less a deer. But not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!" Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. more...

    New Technology

    Hot 6 years ago

    A german, a japanese, and a texan were all in a sauna butt-naked.All they were wearing was a towel around their waist.
    All of a sudden, the german looks at his side.The texan, wondering what he was doing, saw he had a pager built into his side. He said you have a pager built into your waist?
    The german says, "
    Yeah! New german technology great stuff!"
    The texan was confused.
    Then, all of a sudden, they heard a ringing sound. The japanese started talking into his wrist.The texan saw this and said"
    You have a telephone built into your wrist?"
    The japanese said,"
    Yeah! new japanese technology! great stuff!"
    Confused once more, the texan just said,"
    I got to use the men's room, I need time to think."
    So he went, and when he got back, he found that the german was looking at him kinda' funny. Wondering why, the german said,"
    You have a piece of toliet paper coming out of your butt!"
    The more...

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