Alphabet Jokes / Recent Jokes
It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, "What are you up to?" Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!" Jake, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along. They arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot." Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant - much less a deer. But not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!" Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. more...
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
How many letters are there in the alphabet?
Noel, noel, noel, noel. .. the angels did say...
E. T. went home.
Get rid of X. There`s too many unknowns in the world already!
(Only one vowel left, or is that "Anly ana vawal laft" This may be stretching it a bit, but not unless you consider, as our good friends in Canada say: Good day, A!
And we all know that M Ms melt in your mouth, so it`s safe to count them out.
And of course, Y not.
We might as well put off using U until later in the year: See U in September
TWA just took off!!
New scientific theories3rd RunnerUp- Communist China is technologically underdevelopedbecause they have no alphabet. The lack of an alphabet meansthe Chinese cannot use "acronyms"; thus, they cannot communicatetheir ideas at a faster rate.
His parents had just moved to town, and it was his first day in first
grade at the new school. He was really nervous, but he didn't do so badly,
he learned to count to '50', when most of the other kids could
only count to 30, (some kids got to 35, but our boy got all the way to 50
and only missed a couple of numbers)
Our hero was so excited, that when he got home he told his dad
how well he had done in school. His dad said "Son, you did so well
becuase you're an [ethnic]."
The next day the kids learned the alphabet in school. Most of th ekids got
as far as 'M' or 'Q', but our hero got all the way to 'Z', and only missed
a couple of letters.
That evening, bursting with pride, he told his dad how he had done better
than all the other students
on the alphabet. His dad said "Son, you did so well
becuase you're an [ethnic]."
The next day, in gym class, our hero notced that he was a bit more...
Teacher: Alvin, how many letters are in the alphabet?
Alvin: 18.
Teacher: Wrong, there are 26.
Alvin: No, teacher, there used to be 26, but ET went home in a UFO and the CIA went after him.
If you invited all the alphabet to tea who would be late?
The letters 'UVWXYZ' because they all come after 'T'.