Senator Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Senator John Kerry, recovering from prostate surgery, was told it would be six weeks before he could be sexually active.
    John Edwards called to wish Kerry well.
    Al Sharpton called Kerry to offer prayers.
    Howard Dean called with encouragement on recovery.
    Bill Clinton called Teresa.

    Bad Jokes The following riddles and jokes were made up by BADJOKE. EXE, an MS-DOSprogram. You probably haven't heard most of them. Please try not to laughtoo hard and feel free to flame as much as you like--we are all likepassengers on the deck of the Titanic discussing what we're going to do whenwe get to shore. How can you tell when a mechanic has been behind your nuclear warhead? There are nubile lambchops all over your pizza! How can you tell when a pope has been coming towards your spaceship? There are laughing travelling salesmen in your banana! How do you get 100 gargoyles into a nuclear warhead? Throw in a lawn sprinkler! Why do motorcycles fold born-again eyeballs? To diaper their skyscrapers! Why do policemen have toilets? So that yaks will disobey them! What do you get when you cross a Barbie doll and a banana? An angry nurse! What did the Democrat say to the kettle drum?" Ignore my eyeball, you square baby!"What did the finger say ot the lawn sprinkler?" more...

    GOP Senator Nancy Riley has joined the Democratic Party because, "The moderate Republican has been pushed aside for the extreme right wing."
    "I never pushed her," said Senator Joe Lieberman.

    "Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. You know, the one with only seven commandments."
    - David Letterman

    A friend of mine told me the other day that Sonny Bono was thinking of
    running for the Senate in California. If Sonny Bono becomes Senator
    Bono, does that mean we have to find a different nickname for Teddy
    Kennedy?

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