Palestinians Jokes

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    UN Meeting

    Hot 1 year ago

    At the emergency meeting of the UN regarding another conflict in the Middle East, the floor has been given to the Israeli Consul.The Israeli Consul began, "Ladies and gentlemen before I commence with my speech, I wanted to relay an old story to all of you.... ..When Moses was leading the Jews out of Egypt he had to go through deserts, and prairies, and even more deserts... The people became thirsty and needed water.So Moses struck the side of a mountain with his cane and at the sight of that mountain a pond appeared with crystal clean, cool water. And the people rejoiced and drank to their hearts' content. Moses wished to cleanse his whole body, so he went over to the other side of the pond, took all of his clothes off and dove into the cool waters.Only when Moses came out of the water he discovered that all his clothes had been stolen... And I have reasons to believe that the Palestinians stole his clothes."Yassir Arafat, hearing this accusation, jumps out of his seat and more...

    There is a lot of talk about the United Nations creating a combined strike force with troops from several nations included in it.
    Could it work? Let's take a look at one operation.
    A combined force beach landing on a tropical island. When the troops hit the beach. The Royal Marines go fishing.
    The US Marines wait for CNN to arrive.
    The French don't care whose beach it is; it's French territory now!
    The Canadians watch the Americans very closely, then offer to guard their landing strip.
    The Dutch have a beach party and smoke some dope saying the English don't understand them.
    The Italians go sunbathing.
    The Germans land and build a car factory.
    The West Indians go looking for the Dutch.
    The Austrians just watch the Russians and Germans.
    The Chinese win the natives hearts and minds then kill them.
    The SEALs arrive after dark and kill anyone who is not a SEAL.
    The Aussies and Kiwis land then start fighting each other over a more...

    At the emergency meeting of the UN regarding another conflict in the Middle East, the floor has been given to the Israeli Consul.
    The Israeli Consul began, "Ladies and gentlemen before I commence with my speech, I wanted to relay an old story to all of you...
    When Moses was leading the Jews out of Egypt he had to go through deserts, and prairies, and even more deserts... The people became thirsty and needed water.
    So Moses struck the side of a mountain with his cane and at the sight of that mountain a pond appeared with crystal clean, cool water. And the people rejoiced and drank to their hearts' content. Moses wished to cleanse his whole body, so he went over to the other side of the pond, took all of his clothes off and dove into the cool waters. Only when Moses came out of the water he discovered that all his clothes had been stolen... And I have reasons to believe that the Palestinians stole his clothes."
    Yassir Arafat, hearing this accusation, jumps out more...

    There is a lot of talk about the United Nations creating a combined strike force with troops from several nations included in it.
    Could it work? Let's take a look at one operation.
    A combined force beach landing on a tropical island. When the troops hit the beach.
    The Royal Marines go fishing.
    The US Marines wait for CNN to arrive.
    The French don't care whose beach it is; it's French territory now!
    The Canadians watch the Americans very closely, then offer to guard their landing strip.
    The Dutch have a beach party and smoke some dope saying the English don't understand them.
    The Italians go sunbathing.
    The Germans land and build a car factory.
    The West Indians go looking for the Dutch.
    The Austrians just watch the Russians and Germans.
    The Chinese win the natives hearts and minds then kill them.
    The SEALs arrive after dark and kill anyone who is not a SEAL.
    The Aussies and Kiwis land then start fighting each other over a more...

    The Israeli Ambassador is sitting down with Yassir Arafat to try to work out a peace agreement. The Ambassador asks if he might first tell a story. Arafat tells him to go ahead.
    The Ambassador begins.
    "When Moses was in the desert for 40 years, the Jews got very thirsty and Moses asked God for water and there appeared a beautiful lake. The Jews first drank and then bathed themselves. Moses did the same when it was his turn, but when he came out of the water, all his clothes were gone. "Moses shouted, 'Where are my clothes? Who took them?"' "The Jews answered, 'The Palestinians took them.'"
    Arafat quickly objected by saying that there were no Palestinians at that time.
    he Ambassador looks at Arafat and says, "RIGHT!!! NOW we can begin to negotiate.

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