Minor Jokes / Recent Jokes
clef: what you try never to fall off of.
bass clef: where you wind up if you do fall off.
altos: not to be confused with "Tom's toes," "Bubba's toes" or "Dori-toes".
minor third: your approximate age and grade at the completion of formal schooling.
melodic minor: loretta Lynn's singing dad.
12-tone scale: the thing the State Police weigh your tractor trailer truck with.
quarter tone: what most standard pickups can haul.
sonata: what you get from a bad cold or hay fever.
clarinet: name used on your second daughter if you've already used Betty Jo.
cello: the proper way to answer the phone.
It started out as just a simple fender-bender but a couple of hours later the driver, Chinnamma Sebastian, 49, Philadelphia, PA, wound up in a hospital in critical condition with multiple injuries. Sebastian stood in a grassy area near the location of the minor accident and watched as her car was hooked to the flatbed of a tow truck, when suddenly the 1988 Mercedes went into reverse and rolled off. The car ran over her and hit the tow truck driver, who suffered minor injuries. It finally stopped when it hit another tow truck.
Computer Problem Report Form1. Describe your problem: ________________________________________________________________2. Now, describe the problemaccurately: ________________________________________________________________3. Speculate wildly about the causeof the problem: ________________________________________________________________4. Problem Severity: A. Minor __ B. Minor __ C. Minor __ D. Trivial __5. Nature of the problem: A. Locked Up __ B. Frozen __ C. Hung __ D. Strange Smell __6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes __ No __7. Is it turned on? Yes __ No __8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes __ No __9. Have you made it worse? Yes __10. Have you had a friend who knowsall about computers. Try to fix itfor you? Yes __ No __11. Did they make it even worse? Yes __12. Have you read the manual? Yes __ No __13. Are you sure you've read the manual? Maybe __ No __14. Are you absolutely you'veread the manual? No __15. If you read the manual, do you thinkyou understood it? Yes __ No more...
After a minor mathematical error on a routine report, a workers boss tried to belittle him in front of his peers. Angrily she asked, "If you had 4 apples and I asked for one, how many would you have left?" Quickly he replied, "If it was you who asked, Id still have 4 apples."
Computer Problem Report Form1. Describe your problem: ________________________________ ________________________________2. Now, describe the problem accurately: ________________________________ ________________________________3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem: ________________________________ ________________________________4. Problem Severity: A. Minor __ B. Minor __ C. Minor __ D. Trivial __5. Nature of the problem: A. Locked Up __ B. Frozen __ C. Hung __ D. Strange Smell __6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes __ No __7. Is it turned on? Yes __ No __8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes __ No __9. Have you made it worse? Yes __10. Have you had a friend who knows all about computers. Try to fix it for you? Yes __ No __11. Did they make it even worse? Yes __12. Have you read the manual? Yes __ No __13. Are you sure you've read the manual? Maybe __ No __14. Are you absolutely you've read the manual? No __15. If you read the manual, do you think you understood it? Yes more...