Did you hear about the midget that overdosed on Viagra?
He's a little stiff now.
The horny midget found that the best way to make time with women was to be direct about it. So he went up to the tallest blondest woman at the party and said,"Hey, honey, whaddaya say to a little fuck?"
She looked down at him and promptly replied, "Hello, you little fuck!"
In Manhatan a midget got onto the elevator.
A few floors down a huge black man got in, and said "Do you know that my
body weighs 300 pounds, in fact each one of my balls weighs 25 pounds, my
dick is 35 inches long and my name is Turner Brown."
The midget fainted dead away
After being revived by the paramedics the midget asked the
black man to repeat his last few words.
The black man replied "I said my name is Turner Brown."
"Thank God!" said the midget, "I thought you said 'turn around'".
An MG Midget pulled alongside a Rolls-Royce at a traffic light. "Do you have a car phone?" its driver asked the guy in the Rolls.
"Of course I do," replied the haughty deluxe-car driver.
"Well, do you have a fax machine?"
The driver in the Rolls sighed. "I have that too."
"Then do you have a double bed in the back?" the Midget driver wanted to know.
Ashen-faced, the Rolls driver sped off. That afternoon, he had a mechanic install a double bed in his auto.
A week later, the Rolls driver passes the same MG Midget, which is parked on the side of the road--back windows fogged up and steam pouring out. The arrogant driver pulls over, gets out of the Rolls and bangs on the Midget's back window until the driver sticks his head out. "I want you to know that I had a double bed installed," brags the Rolls driver.
The Midget driver is unimpressed. "You got me out of the more...
Two lil leprechauns went off to St Mary's convent and begged an audience with the mother superior. "well, how can I help you little folk?" asked the Mother Superior.
The larger and more intelligent looking of the leprechauns asked "Well, mother superior, would you be a knowing any midget nuns here at the convent?"
"Afraid not," replies Mother Superior, "there are no midget nuns here"
"all right then, would you be knowing of any midget nuns in all of Ireland then?"
"Well, no," replied Mother Superior, "none that I know of."
"Well then, in the whole world of nuns, would you know of any Midget nuns?"
"No, I would'nt - there are no midget nuns in the whole of the world!" said Mother Superior, "and would you please tell me what this is all about?"
The asking leprechaun turned sadly to the stupid leprechaun and said "well, I told you so...you've been dating a more...