Medication Jokes / Recent Jokes

Have you heard about the new medication that both an aphrodisiac and laxative?
It's called "Easy Cum, Easy Go".

Man standing was the pharmacy counter finishing up on his purchase, while the next lady in line keeps coming up to the counter thinking the gentlemen was finished.
Finally, he moves to the side to allow the impatient lady to come to the counter.
She rushes the pharmacist asking "Are you a pharmacist?
He said "Yes I am."
"Will you please tell me something about viagra?" she asked.
The pharmacist said "I would be glad to. Well it a prescription medication used for men who are having sexual problems. Your doctor has to write a prescription for this medication."
He also further states "Its a great medication, I even take it at times."
The lady then interrupts to ask "Can get it over the counter?"
"If I take two."

Online dating is huge now. Everyone from EHarmony to Match.com have been benefitting from the surge in personals. But impersonal nature of online personals need a little clarifying. Below you'll find a guide to better enable yourself "Find That Special Someone"
Female
Beautiful Bulgarian girl = I need a green card
Beautiful Ukranian girl = I need a green card
Beautiful Romanian girl = I need a green card....possibly a gypsy
I love doing yoga and running with my dog = a really good lay
Athletic = No tits
Spends too much time at work / Work Hard = I'm cheating on you and we haven't even met
Beautiful = Pathological liar
Contagious Smile = Takes a lot of pills
Emotionally Secure = On medication / Frequent Psychiatric Visits
Feminist = Fat
Free spirit = Junkie / Hippie
Hopeless romantic = Wants a Ring
Friendship first = Former slut
Fun = Annoying
New-Age = Body hair in the wrong places
very goal oriented = She more...

(or will I ever forgive myself?)

They say that the louder you groan at a pun, the better it is and the more jealous you are. My hand is cupped to my ear and I'm listening...

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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank -- proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.

Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.

A mushroom walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. The bartender says,' We don't serve mushrooms here.' The mushroom says,' Why?! I'm a fun guy!'

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces:' I'm lookin' for the man who shot my more...