Disease Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Ed zachary disease

    Hot 11 months ago

    A woman was very distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in quite some time.
    She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she decided to seek the medical expertise of a sex therapist.
    Her doctor recommended that she see the well known Chinese sex therapist, Dr. Chang. So she went to see him.
    Upon entering the examination room, Dr. Chang said, "OK, take off all your crose."
    The woman did as she was told.
    "Now, get down and craw reery, reery fass to odderside of room." Again,
    The woman did as she was instructed.
    Dr. Chang then said, "OK, now craw reery, reery fass back to me." So
    she did..
    Dr.Chang shook his head slowly and said, "Your probrem vewy bad. You
    haf Ed Zachary Disease. Worse case I ever see. Dat why you not haf sex or dates."
    Worried, the woman asked anxiously, "Oh my God, Dr. Chang, what is Ed Zachary Disease?"
    Dr. Chang sighed deeply, and more...

    Chronic disease!

    Hot 1 year ago

    An army Major visiting the sick army men, went to one soldier and asked, "What's your problem, Soldier?"
    "Chronic syphilis, Sir."
    "What treatment are you getting?"
    "Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
    "What's your ambition?"
    "To get back to the front, Sir."
    "Good man," said the Major.
    He went to the next bed, "What's your problem, Soldier?"
    "Chronic piles, Sir."
    "What treatment are you getting?"
    "Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
    "What's your ambition?"
    "To get back to the front, Sir."
    "Good man," barked the Major.
    He moved to the next bed where Santa was lying and asked, "What's your problem, Soldier?"
    "Chronic gum disease, Sir"
    "What treatment are you getting?"
    "Five minutes with the wire brush each day."
    "What's more...

    Mad Cows

    Hot 7 months ago

    A female reporter was conducting an interview with a farmer about Mad Cow Disease. "Mr. Brown, do you have any idea what might be the cause of the disease?"
    "Sure. Do you know the bulls only screw the cows once a year?"
    "Umm, sir, that is a new piece of information, but what's the relationship between this and Mad Cow?"
    "And did you know we milk the cows twice a day?"
    "Mr. Brown, that's interesting, but, what's the point?"
    "Lady, the point is this: if I'm playing with your tits twice a day, but only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you go mad, too?"

    Arkansas Scholars

    Hot 1 year ago

    Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president someday.)
    Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
    Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
    Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
    Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
    Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets a election.
    Q: What are steroids? A: more...

    Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimer's disease?
    A: Her IQ goes up!

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