Industry Jokes / Recent Jokes

Humorous Computer-Related AcronymsIBM I Blame Microsoft Idiots Buy Me Idiots Building Machines I'll Buy Macintoshes It Bit Me It Built Microsoft It's Better Manually I've Been Mislead I've Been Mugged WINDOWS Well, It Never Does Operate With Speed When I Need Data Output Without Speed While Idle, Needs DX or WorkStation Will Install Needless Data On Whole System WIN Whoppingly Immense NOP Worm Infestation Netware MS-WINDOWS NT / WINDOWS NT My Solitaire With Its New De-accelerator, Only With Some Network Technology Well Intended, Netword De-accelerator, Only Works Sometimes, Never Totally WINDOWS (as a) Network Trojan Different Operating Systems ExpectationsMacintosh: What You See Is What You Get MS-DOS: You Asked For It, You Got It UNIX: IfUHv2sk, UDntWnt2Kno VMS: You Got It, All Of It, Want It Or Not Random Abbreviations for Many Computer CompaniesAPPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity DEC: Dump Everything and Close DEC: Do Expect Cuts HCL: Hilarious Computer Logic HP: Hot more...

Washington Native Americans
New York Very Tall People
Dallas Western-Style Laborers
L. A. Uninvited Guests
Minnesota Plundering Norsemen
Green Bay Meat Industry Workers.
San Francisco Precious Metal Enthusiasts
New Orleans Pretty Good People
Phoenix Male Finches
Miami Pelagic Percoid Food Fishes
Denver Untamed Beasts of Burden
Cincinnati Large Bangladeshi Carnivorous Mammals
Tampa Bay West Indies Freebooters
Detroit Large Carnivorous Cats
Chicago Securities-Traders-in-a-Declining-Market
Indianapolis Young Male Horses
New England Zealous Lovers of Country
Atlanta Hovering Birds of Prey
Philadelphia Largely Non-Hovering Birds of Prey
Seattle Oceanic Birds of Prey
Tampa Bay Ocean-Going Unlawful Salvage Personnel
Houston Liquid Fossil Fuel Devotees
(or taking a different interpretation of oilers) Wheel Rotation Perpetuators
LA Male Horned Largely-Mountain Faring more...

The software engineering field is staffed primarily by men; the ratio of male to female software engineers is on the order of 15 to 1. This makes it pretty easy for women to find potential mates among their peers.

However, software types have a well-earned reputation for being, well, a little strange. While discussing the prospect of working in the software industry, one woman commented to another: “The odds are good, but the goods are odd. ”

Humorous Computer-Related AcronymsIBM I Blame Microsoft Idiots Buy Me Idiots Building Machines I'll Buy Macintoshes It Bit Me It Built Microsoft It's Better Manually I've Been Mislead I've Been Mugged WINDOWS Well, It Never Does Operate With Speed When I Need Data Output Without Speed While Idle, Needs DX or WorkStation Will Install Needless Data On Whole System WIN Whoppingly Immense NOP Worm Infestation Netware MS-WINDOWS NT / WINDOWS NT My Solitaire With Its New De-accelerator, Only With Some Network Technology Well Intended, Netword De-accelerator, Only Works Sometimes, Never Totally WINDOWS (as a) Network Trojan Different Operating Systems ExpectationsMacintosh: What You See Is What You Get MS-DOS: You Asked For It, You Got It UNIX: IfUHv2sk, UDntWnt2Kno VMS: You Got It, All Of It, Want It Or Not Random Abbreviations for Many Computer CompaniesAPPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity DEC: Dump Everything and Close DEC: Do Expect Cuts HCL: Hilarious Computer Logic HP: Hot more...

PCMCIA- People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN- It Still Does Nothing
APPLE- Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
SCSI- System Can't See It
BASIC- Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control
IBM- I Blame Microsoft
CD-ROM- Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
OS/2- Obsolete Soon, Too.
WWW- World Wide Wait
MACINTOSH- Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
PENTIUM- Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
COBOL- Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
WINDOWS- Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
MICROSOFT- Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only (for)
Fools (&) Teenagers.

PCMCIA People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN It Still Does Nothing
APPLE Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
SCSI System Can't See It
DOS Defective Operating System
BASIC Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control
IBM I Blame Microsoft
DEC Do Expect Cuts
CD-ROM Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
OS/2 Obsolete Soon, Too.
WWW World Wide Wait
MACINTOSH Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
PENTIUM Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
COBOL Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
AMIGA A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction
LISP Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis
MIPS Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
WINDOWS Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
GIRO Garbage In Rubbish Out
MICROSOFT Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only (for) Fools (&) Teenagers.

PCMCIA- People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms ISDN- It Still Does Nothing APPLE- Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity SCSI- System Can't See It BASIC- Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control IBM- I Blame Microsoft CD-ROM- Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months OS/2- Obsolete Soon, Too. WWW- World Wide Wait MACINTOSH- Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs PENTIUM- Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics COBOL- Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language WINDOWS- Will Install Needless Data On Whole System MICROSOFT- Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only (for) Fools (&) Teenagers.