Climb Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The telephone lineman had been out drinking the night before, and the next day he went to work not feeling too good. He climbed to the top of the first pole and as he took his pliers out to repair the wire he dropped them. He had to climb all the way down to retrieve them.

    As he got to the bottom of the pole and was picking up his pliers, Little Johnny, who was standing there said, "My daddy is a lineman too and he would have had two pair of pliers, so he wouldn't have to climb down the pole if he dropped one of them."

    The lineman tried to ignore Little Johnny and climbed back up the pole very slowly. About his time he needed a hammer to drive in a large nail. As he was taking it out, it slipped and fell to the ground. Again he had to climb down the pole to retrieve it.

    So he slowly climbed down the pole and sure enough Little Johnny was still standing there. He said, "My daddy is a lineman too and he would have carried two hammers so if more...

    The light bulb

    Hot 2 years ago

    A factory foreman is walking through the work area, and notices that Kawolski isn't at his station.
    He asks one of the other workers if they know where Kawolski is, and the employee points straight up in the air. The foreman looks up, and there's Kawolski, hanging by one arm from the rafters.
    "Get down from there, Kawolski," he yells, to which Kawolski replies, "But I'm a light bulb!"
    The boss is -NOT- impressed, and makes Kawolski climb down and get back to work.
    About an hour later, the boss is walking through the factory once again, and once again he notices that Kawolski is missing. On a hunch, he looks up, and again sees Kawolski hanging by one arm from the rafters.
    The foreman makes him climb down, and chews him out, saying that if he catches Kawolski up there one more time, he's going to get fired.
    Another hour later, the boss is making another round, and sure enough... there's Kawolski, hanging by one arm from the more...

    Why did the blond climb on the roof?
    She heard that drinks were on the house

    "Rabbi," the man said, "Please explain the Talmud to me."
    "Very well," he said. "First, I will ask you a question. If two men climb
    up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean,
    which one washes himself?"
    "The dirty one," answers the man.
    "No. They look at each other and the dirty man thinks he is clean
    and the clean man thinks he is dirty, therefore, the clean man washes
    himself. Now, another question. If two men climb up a chimney and one
    comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?"
    The man smiles and says, "You just told me, Rabbi. The man who is clean
    washes himself because he thinks he is dirty."
    "No," says the Rabbi. "If they each look at themselves, the clean man knows
    he doesn't have to wash himself, so the dirty man washes himself.
    Now, one more question. If two men climb up a chimney and one more...

    1. Watch the sunset- on a sled.2. Smile more, -it might get you a free beer.3. Complain less. -It might get you a free beer.4. Surprise a friend with a call. - It might get you a free beer.5. Develop your gifts. - You might need them.6. Count your blessings. - You might need these too! 7. Talk to someone in an elevator. - Particularly ones with Arctic Cat jackets on, or those carrying beer.8. Breathe consciously once in a while. - This cures snoring.9. Enjoy sneezes - and stay behind the one sneezing.10. Appreciate that your leg isn't broken, - unless you are an actor.11. Be unique, -it demonstrates difference! 12. Sing in the shower. - With a friend! 13. Put your shoes on the wrong feet and laugh at yourself, - or have someone laugh at you.14. Make someone's day, - or night.15. Stand on your head. - For a free beer! 16. Stare at the world above you. - Hopefully not from under a bar.17. Play with an animal. - Be sure it is one which cannot eat you! 18. Slurp Jell-O. -Add Vodka for more...

  • Recent Activity